Mob Boss Agrees to Shoot Man in Kneecaps Before Weekend
CHICAGO, IL - "I swore off horse races for 10 years, but I relapsed," Sam Hemsworth told us from his wheelchair. "Before I knew it, I was in $40,000 deep with the mob again....
Texas Execution Delayed Due to Inmate’s NPO Status
DALLAS, TX – For the third time this week a Texas execution was canceled due to the prison inmate #474901’s NPO status. "Someone’s got to get their act together over there as this is the...
Nervous Rituals Now Billable As Preventative Care
HEAVERNER, OK - Luck of the Draw Medical Center (LDMC) has been featured on GomerBlog before because of porcelain bedpan incantations proven to ward off bad luck on full moon Friday the 13ths. However, these extreme...
AMA: Casino Cruise Business ‘In the Works’
CHICAGO, IL - The American Medical Association (AMA) was initially formed to represent the interests of physicians and "to promote the art and science of medicine and the betterment of public health." Lately their diversification...
ICD-10 Already Being Updated to ICD-10.2 in 2014
WASHINGTON, DC - The much anticipated ICD-10 implementation in October 2014 will have new competition. Even before the official release of ICD-10, the International Statistical Classification of Diseases and Related Health Problems (ICD) is...
Local Man Upset He’s Not Getting His Healthcare Money’s Worth
DAYTON, OH - Local resident, Phil Summers, complained that he isn’t getting his "money’s worth" when it comes to healthcare. "I am in top physical condition, I have no need to see a physician."
Phil...
Crying Baby Really Trying to Say ‘I Hate You!’
NEW HAVEN, CT – A new study just published in Pediatrics this month demonstrated that countless parent’s suspicions and anxieties were absolutely correct: When infants cry, they really are trying to say, "I hate you!"
The randomized double-blinded...
Words With Friends to Add HIPAA-Compliant Messaging
The popular mobile game, Words With Friends, just added HIPAA compliant secure messaging. Spokesperson Gene Catterspolti said, "It was a highly requested feature as many physicians play WWF on rounds, on call, in the OR,...
Bob Costas’ Eye Infection Starting to Get Infected
SOCHI, RUSSIA – Famous sports anchor Bob Costas has been plagued by a recent eye infection. The infection started in his left eye and has moved over to his right eye. This frustrating infection has...
STDs Running Rampant in Sochi Olympic Village
SOCHI, RUSSIA – Apparently what happens in Sochi doesn’t always stay there. Olympic athletes have been going at it strong and GomerBlog is sad to report that there are now numerous outbreaks of sexually...