• 144
    Shares
FaceLyft
“Need a lift to your facelift? Try FaceLyft”

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – Catering to the very specific niche of passengers needing rides to and from their plastic surgery appointments, Lyft’s new offshoot rideshare app FaceLyft opens for business today to much abuzzed fanfare.  It is a much-welcomed addition to the health care rideshare community, whose options are limited only to waaaaambulances, pneumatic tube systems, and UberGURNEYs.  Though this app only proves beneficial for patients looking to undergo breast augmentation, liposuction, or botox injections, other patients are hoping FaceLyft’s presence forces greater competition in the patient rideshare industry.  They indeed may be right as rumors of UberPLACEMENT for gomers and Lyftweights for orthopedic appointments are slowly gaining heft.

  • 144
    Shares
Dr. 99
First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.
WordPress › Error

There has been a critical error on this website.

Learn more about troubleshooting WordPress.