Thursday, March 28, 2024

Anesthesiology

anesthesia clinic

Anesthesia Pre-Op Clinic Moved to the 4th Floor

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CLEVELAND, OH – With budgets being slashed and insurers looking to save money, the Anesthesia Department at Memorial Hospital made a significant change to its Anesthesia Pre-Op Clinic.  The clinic moved to a section of the building that...
CPR

CPR Guidelines Made Even Simpler

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Mouth-to-mouth resuscitation was replaced by only chest compression in 2008 after a slow de-emphasis on replacement breathing.  This made CPR simple and easy to remember, and the chest compressions were set to the cadence of...
medical consult

What ‘Thank You for the Interesting Consult’ Really Means, Part 1

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Initial consult notes usually end with the following line: Thank you for the interesting consult.  What does that really mean?  In the first of a two-part series, our GomerBlog translators will help break down...

Vital Signs Much Worse After Implementing Anesthesia Automatic Electronic Records

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BOSTON, MA - Huge swings in vital sign monitoring have some anesthesiologists and hospital administrators wondering how new automatic electronic records programs could be causing patient’s vitals to have "huge swings" as opposed to manual paper charting. "I’m...
Pyxis machine broken glass

Pyxis Machine Dispenses Broken Glass Dilaudid Ampule, Laughs on the Inside

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CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA - GomerBlog brings breaking news regarding those fragile glass fentanyl and Dilaudid ampules in the Pyxis machine.  Apparently the machine enjoys dispensing medications with a cracked top, and even "laughs on the inside" according to...

Doula Organization Claims Medical Legitimacy

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SAN DIEGO, CA - Craig Hartford, spokesman for the Doula Association of Southern California (DASC), released a statement last week claiming that doulas had at last achieved medical legitimacy. Mr. Hartford is referring to an incident...
anesthesiologist table height

Anesthesiologist Cancels Case After Hearing Patient is ‘Gassy’

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CHARLOTTE, NC - OR 4 at Mercy Hospital was moving “ahead of schedule” according to charge nurse Diane Cingler.  “Turns out we are getting out of here even sooner!”  The surgeon was disappointed he...

Anesthesiologist and Surgeon Can’t Agree on Patient’s Care by Midnight Deadline, Hospital Shutdown Ensues

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ROANOKE, VA – Dr. Foster was experiencing some bleeding during his right hemicolectomy.  He asked, “What is the patient’s blood pressure?”  Dr. Heathstrom looked up from his Sudoku puzzle: “112/78” and then returned to his work. “No,...

Scrub Machine Programmed to ‘Mess with Staff’

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CHICAGO, IL - Recent discoveries in computer programming have allowed programers of Dameda Scrub Machines to program a very interesting feature: the scrub machine can sense "how busy or lost" a person looks when...
Laparoscopic surgery

Flatulence to Blame for Failed Laparoscopic Procedure

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IOWA CITY, IA – Yesterday was a typical operating day at Holy Cross Hospital in room #12 until 1:45 p.m.  The room was a general surgery room full of appendectomies and other laparoscopic procedures. ...