Monday, February 8, 2021


Hospital Bans Seeing-Eye Dog from OR, ADA Suit Follows

FORT WAYNE, IL - Memorial Hospital has barred Dr. Alan Peterson from bringing his seeing-eye dog, Karmen, into the operating room (OR) where he has been employed as an anesthesiologist for the last 8.5 years. ...

Study Shows More Studies Would Be Needed to Study Future Results

BETHESDA, MD – A recent article published in the New England Journal of Medicine discovered that more studies would be needed to study future results.  "This is truly remarkable," said medical expert Dr. Tom Hutch....

Curare Darts Phased Out Despite Drug Shortages

MACON, GA - Like many medical centers, St. Joseph the Protector Hospital is experiencing severe drug shortages, especially in the operating room.  The latest unobtainable drug is the non-depolarizing paralyzing agent succinylcholine, usually reserved in...
anesthesiologist hospital

Hospital Replaces Anesthesiologists with Voice-Activated OR Tables, Saves Millions

SAN JOSE, CA - In what appears to be a medical first, surgeons at Methodist Northwest Hospital have found that using voice-activated operating room tables instead of anesthesiologists or CRNAs is working remarkably well. "It’s...
anesthesiologists tone

Rectal Tone of Anesthesiologists Varies with Patients’ Oxygen Saturation

BERLIN, GERMANY - A new and controversial study out of the esteemed Higginstein Community Surgery Center describes a curious phenomenon regarding rectal tone of anesthesiologists in response to the oxygen saturations of their patients. Noted researcher...
reverse trendelenburg

Doctor Reverse Actually the Discoverer of Reverse-Trendelenburg

MUNICH, GERMANY – Agatha Reverse is a well-known surgeon from Germany around 1870, who removed numerous gallbladders.  To help her with surgical exposure she decided to place the patient at a 30-degree angle with the head higher than...

Conrad Murray Hired Promoting Exclusive Anesthesia Use for Propofol

HOUSTON, TX – Dr. Conrad Murray, a smooth criminal, has been released from jail following his two-year sentence for the death of Michael Jackson.  He has been unable to find a job as a cardiologist due to losing his...

ASA Updates Algorithm to Account for Redheads

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - The American Society of Anesthesiologists (ASA) released new guidelines that update their infamous ASA classification system to account for the anesthetic considerations of a patient with "red hair."  "We experience vast...

Hospital Approves Giving Parents Medication Before Children’s Surgery

HOUSTON, TX - Last week, Children's General Hospital approved a new medication protocol to assist children undergoing surgical procedures.  Anxiolytic medication, such as midazolam, can now be administered to parents to children headed to...