Nursing Student

Nursing student satire

Nursing Student Enters OR Without Shoe Covers: Beatings Commence

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WARWICK, RI - The student nurse stared nervously at the blood-red line bisecting the hallway.  Scrub hat and surgical mask, check.  Full breakfast and...
nurse mary penny

Cashier Who Criticized Nurse’s Appearance Fired Due to Rude Personality

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Last week, Nurse Mary Penney was in line at a store when a cashier critiqued her appearance and found it surprising that she was...

ER’s New Dilaudid Salt Lick, Admissions Down 90%

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SACRAMENTO, CA - Sutter Health System is changing the game.  In a world of overcrowded ERs and the inability to triage efficiently, new innovations...
wound care don't care

The Truth Comes Out: Wound Care Team Actually Doesn’t Care About Wound

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MOUNT LAUREL, NJ - Brace yourselves, a long-assumed notion once held about a certain class of health care professionals has just been completely obliterated:...
Hamilton, Lin-Manuel Miranda, Pyxis

Pyxis Replaces Lin-Manuel Miranda in “Hamilton”

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NEW YORK, NY - It's official: Lin-Manuel Miranda's replacement in the critically-acclaimed Broadway smash "Hamilton" is none other than the beloved Pyxis MedStation System, who...
male patient asking for urinal

Healthy Ambulating Male Continues to Ask Nurses for Urinal

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ATTLEBORO, MA - A very upset Ronald Stern is suing Sturdy Memorial Hospital for the pain and suffering he experienced when his nurse asked...
call button nursing lockout interval

American Nurses Association Approves Call Lights with Lockout Intervals

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SILVER SPRING, MD - In an effort to bolster nursing satisfaction, the American Nurses Association (ANA) have unanimously approved the replacement of current call...
Saline Lock Heparin Lock

Oh No: Nurse Misplaces Key, Saline Lock Locked Forever

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NEW YORK, NY - Nurse Brad Frohne remains frantic this morning.  Yes, it has been more than the average level of busy today but...
iv pca infusion pump WiFi

In the Name of Patient Satisfaction, IV Pumps Fitted with WiFi

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BOSTON, MA - As much as they don’t want to admit it, health care professionals have succumbed to the reality of patient satisfaction surveys...
tatoo

Study Finds Needle Anxiety Worsens with Tattoos

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BALTIMORE, MD - Johns Hopkins researchers published a shocking new study in this month's New England Journal of Medicine showing a correlation between the...