Nursing Student

Nursing student satire

hospital administrators

Jealous of Nurses Week, Hospital Administrators Plan to Create Administrators Week

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ATLANTA, GA - Jealous of all the attention registered nurses (RNs) have received during Nurses Week, hospital administrators nationwide are hoping to create an...
iv pca infusion pump WiFi

In the Name of Patient Satisfaction, IV Pumps Fitted with WiFi

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BOSTON, MA - As much as they don’t want to admit it, health care professionals have succumbed to the reality of patient satisfaction surveys...
childhood obesity

Thai Cave Divers to Locate Obese Patient’s Genitals

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KEARNEY, NE - With options dwindling, all hopes rest on the heroic divers who saved the boys in Thailand to locate a 600-lb. man’s...
golden bladder award

Hero Nurse Wins the Coveted Golden Bladder Award

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MOUNT CARMEL, PA - Local ER nurse Jada Adams was recently recognized for her uncanny ability to retain large amounts of urine in her...
ACTH stim test serum cortisol

New ACTH Stim Test Measures Serum Cortisol Every Minute

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WASHINGTON, D.C. – Today new guidelines released by the Endocrine Society (ES) encourage modification of the standard high-dose ACTH stimulation test with measurement of...
inpatient bed

Nurse Disappointed to Receive Patient on Broken Inpatient Bed

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CHICAGO, IL - RN Rebecca Stanton was in shock and disbelief today when she received a patient from the OR backwards, soiled, and in...
nurses station

Study Finds No Nurses Station Exists With 1:1 Ratio of Computers to Chairs

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BOSTON, MA - A landmark study published in the Just-Like-New England Journal of Medicine has confirmed that no nurses station in any health care...

Former United Security Guard Landed on Feet as Nurse-Assaulting Cop

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SALT LAKE CITY, UT - Former United Security Guard and all-around jerk-face Jeff Payne was very concerned he wouldn't be able to find employment after...

Charting Suspended, Call Lights Disabled, Bathroom Breaks Okayed for National Nurses Week

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SILVER SPRING, MD – To celebrate National Nurses Week from May 6 to May 12 this year, hospitals and clinics across the country are...
nursing call light

Tips for Patients: How to Use a Call Light

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Nurses are incredibly busy.  And by busy we mean doing endless charting.  So much so that they're contractually not allowed to eat or urinate....