Nursing Student

Nursing student satire

the view

Patient Leaps to Death After Hospital TV Stuck on The View, Joint Commission Investigating

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OMAHA, NE - Burpelson Hospital is investigating the apparent suicide of patient Grover Downs on the 13-East psychiatric unit.  Mr. Downs, an 84-year-old man...

Local ER Offering Pain Meds Freebased, or Heated on a Spoon and Injected

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NORFOLK, VA – Local ER is now offering patients the option of their pain medication freebased or heated on a spoon and injected.  “We...
nurse helping

Study Shows ‘Hold On, I’ll Get Your Nurse’ Most Common Phrase Doctors Say to...

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A new survey published this month reveals the sentence “Hold on, I’ll get your nurse” to be the most common thing doctors say to...
wound care don't care

The Truth Comes Out: Wound Care Team Actually Doesn’t Care About Wound

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MOUNT LAUREL, NJ - Brace yourselves, a long-assumed notion once held about a certain class of health care professionals has just been completely obliterated:...
doctorate of nursing

Nurse Raises the Post-Nominal Letter Bar

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PORTLAND, OR - Nurse Ruth Scrittle, ASN, BSN, MSN, DNP, RN, MBA, CEN, ACLS, CENP, FAEN, is actively petitioning to have additional letters added...
foley catheter

Clumsy Intern Keeps Tripping Over Patients’ Foley Catheters

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BOULDER, CO - Patients, nurses, and urologists at Boulder Medical Center are starting to lose patience with intern Willie Johnson, who despite being incredibly...
ACTH stim test serum cortisol

New ACTH Stim Test Measures Serum Cortisol Every Minute

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WASHINGTON, D.C. – Today new guidelines released by the Endocrine Society (ES) encourage modification of the standard high-dose ACTH stimulation test with measurement of...

Half Slice of Cake Left for Night Shift

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Keeping with longstanding tradition, med-surg dayshift nurses consumed all the break room cake except for half of a slice. “Thank you to all the doctors...
incentive spirometer incentivized spirometer

A Step-by-Step Guide on How to Use Incentive Spirometers (or Marijuana)

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Is this your first time using an incentive spirometer (or marijuana)?  Well, you're in luck: our Gomerblog team has created this easy 15-step process...
chloride

Breaking: Nurse Initiates Lesser-Known Chloride Repletion Protocol

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - Nurse Jess Casamento of Ochsner Medical Center is one of the best when it comes to repleting electrolytes: potassium, magnesium, even...