Friday, April 26, 2024

Nursing Student

Nursing student satire

code doorframe

RN Shocked Code Isn’t Etched Somewhere on Door, Doorframe

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - Confronted with a locked door with an electronic keypad, a nurse was shocked to find that the code was not blatantly etched on the door or doorframe somewhere.

Spooky: Pyxis Swallows Nurse Whole, Rescue Underway

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NEW YORK, NY - In unexpected and unfortunate news today, floor nurse Yelena Ivanovic was accidentally swallowed by her Pyxis machine shortly after engaging the fingerprint identification system, which is puzzling since she even...
nurse olympics

Nurse Olympics: Results

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CHICAGO, IL – The host hospital of this year's Nurse Olympics, Chicago General, is now recovering after all the fanfare.  Nurses came from all over the U.S. and parts of Canada to compete in...

Nurses Excited to Make Their Own PPE

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A national shortage of personal protective equipment or PPE is forcing nurses to get creative. "I'm so happy to live in a country where...

Patients on Contact Precautions in Hospital, Now Required to Have Yellow Cart Outside of...

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - A new mandate was recently passed that now requires ALL patients that were in contact precautions in the hospital, must have a yellow contact precaution cart outside of their home after...

STAT Officially Means “Maybe”

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Ever wonder why your 8 AM stat blood draw hasn’t been done even though it’s now 7 PM the next day?  Now we know.  Earlier this morning the Institute of Phlebotomy...
nice patient endangered species

Breaking: Nice Patients Added to Endangered Species List

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a move suggesting they are likely to become extinct unless something more is done to save them for future generations, the National Academy of Medicine (NAM; formerly known as the Institute...
upset patient

Repeatedly Yelling “NURSE!!!” Less Effective Than Using Call Bell, Study Finds

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A new study published in The Lancet shows that using the call bell to get your nurse’s attention is 25% more effective than repeatedly yelling “NURSE!!!” over and over again.  Many health care advocacy...

The 5 Stages of Boards Preparation

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GomerBlog breaks down the 5 stages of Boards preparation: Denial "I don't need to study yet... it's much more important to (fill in blank: shop for Chanel skin care products, catch up on Game of Thrones...
TLC

Sign Out: Patient Just Needs a Little TLC

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ATLANTA, GA - A patient is transferring out of the medical intensive care unit today and, according to the MICU team, "just needs a little TLC" before being discharged home.