New IV Pumps Have Silence Button Lasting 24 Hours
GREENVILLE, SC - Hailing it as 2019's best new medical invention, a new IV pump by Shmalaris is like any other competitor's IV pump...
Patient Still 10/10 Pain Even After a ‘Being-Set-On-Fire’ Analogy
NEWARK, NJ - Patient Deborah Skemp woke up today at 6:30 a.m. during rounds by her physician Dr. Waters. He asked her the usual morning...
Clumsy Intern Keeps Tripping Over Patients’ Foley Catheters
BOULDER, CO - Patients, nurses, and urologists at Boulder Medical Center are starting to lose patience with intern Willie Johnson, who despite being incredibly...
Nurse Assigned to Shake Empty Toner Cartridge Every 5 Minutes
LOUISVILLE, KY - As punishment for not charting a respiratory rate other than 16, first-year nurse Randy Tolbert has been relegated from patient care...
Doctor Frantically Considers Options As He Realizes There’s No Toilet Paper Mid-Poop
EL PASO, TX - Facing a crisis of unheralded proportions, medicine intern Edwin Veracruz is mulling over any and all options as he realizes...
New Patient Satisfaction Initiative Mandates That All Patient Baths Have “Happy Ending”
CARY, NC - In a bold and unprecedented move to increase patient satisfaction scores, administrators at Our Lady of Chronic Narcotic Dependence Hospital outside...
Plastic Trophy Nursing Awards Given in North Carolina
RALEIGH, NC - North Carolina has the proud distinction of being the first state in the country to require nurse licensure. In 1903, the...
New ACTH Stim Test Measures Serum Cortisol Every Minute
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Today new guidelines released by the Endocrine Society (ES) encourage modification of the standard high-dose ACTH stimulation test with measurement of...
Debtflix: View School Debt On-Demand Anytime, Anywhere
LOS GATOS, CA - Netflix, a leading provider of subscription-based on-demand streaming media to over 70 million people worldwide, revealed a new service called...