Nursing Student

Nursing student satire

golden bladder award

Hero Nurse Wins the Coveted Golden Bladder Award

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MOUNT CARMEL, PA - Local ER nurse Jada Adams was recently recognized for her uncanny ability to retain large amounts of urine in her...
Fourth of July

Special Pyxis to Dispense American Flags & Flair

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FROM SEA TO SHINING SEA, AMERICA - Hospitals and clinics across this great land of ours will be using special Pyxis machines to dispense American...
inpatient bed

Nurse Disappointed to Receive Patient on Broken Inpatient Bed

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CHICAGO, IL - RN Rebecca Stanton was in shock and disbelief today when she received a patient from the OR backwards, soiled, and in...

ER’s New Dilaudid Salt Lick, Admissions Down 90%

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SACRAMENTO, CA - Sutter Health System is changing the game.  In a world of overcrowded ERs and the inability to triage efficiently, new innovations...
nursing diagnosis

American Nurses Association Pulls the Plug on Nursing Diagnosis

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WASHINGTON, DC - After a close 38-to-35 vote, the leaders of the American Nurses Association (ANA) voted to eliminate the nursing diagnosis from nursing...
call button nursing lockout interval

American Nurses Association Approves Call Lights with Lockout Intervals

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SILVER SPRING, MD - In an effort to bolster nursing satisfaction, the American Nurses Association (ANA) have unanimously approved the replacement of current call...
call room

After Successful Renovation, New Call Room is Now Optimized to Cause Full-On Depression

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JACKSONVILLE, FL - Convinced that being on-call isn't difficult enough in its own right, hospital administrators at Jacksonville Medical Center have successfully completed renovation of its...
urine catheter

Forgot-to-Pee Syndrome Afflicting Millions of Health Care Workers

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WASHINGTON, DC - The Journal of the American National Society, Committee, and Association of Urinary Retention and Other Things Too (JANSCAUROTT) estimates that nearly...
CPR dummy manikin

Breaking: Nurse Successfully Resuscitates CPR Dummy Back to Human Life

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - In some incredible news, critical care nurse Margie Casamento at Tulane Medical Center became the first health care practitioner to successful...

Fortune Cookies Replace Lotto Numbers with Vital Signs

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BROOKLYN, NY - In an effort to appeal to health care professionals who order Chinese food for take out because the cafeteria is closed, fortune...