Pediatrics

mosquito

ToRCHeS Mnemonic Unsure How to Handle New Zika Virus

0
For decades the ToRCHeS mnemonic (Toxoplasma, Rubella, Cytomegalovirus, HIV, Herpes, Syphilis) was the saving grace of every medical, nursing, biology, virology, pharmacology, zoology and frenology...
CPR dummy manikin

Breaking: Nurse Successfully Resuscitates CPR Dummy Back to Human Life

0
NEW ORLEANS, LA - In some incredible news, critical care nurse Margie Casamento at Tulane Medical Center became the first health care practitioner to successful...
narcan fentanyl nipple

Narconipple Implant Helps Add Opioids to Breastfeeding

0
SEATTLE, WA - Narconipple Inc. is pleased to introduce its revolutionary patented product, the Fentanypple.  The Fentanypple is a narcotic breast implant that delivers...
umbilical stump

Citing Health Benefits, New Parents Eating Umbilical Cord Stumps

0
“From the moment I gazed into Andromeda’s perfect eyes, I knew I wanted only the best for her,” says new mom Rochelle Wilson. “Her...

Psychic Hired to Read Patients’ Minds, Doctor Visit Time Reduced

0
BATON ROUGE, LA -- Do you think doctors ask weird questions—like “Do you have any problems with your kidneys?” Or ones that are hard...
googling medical symptoms

Study: 4th Graders with Google Better Doctors Than 96% of New Medical Student Graduates

0
BIRMINGHAM, AL - A new study published last week in Barney and Friends magazine revealed that 4th graders, if given a computer with internet search access, were...
vaccines

Jimmy Kimmel and Real Doctors Preach on Getting Vaccines

86
Another reason to get your kids vaccinated https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgpfNScEd3M
crying hospital

Breaking: First Batch of Crying July 1st Interns Spotted

0
ATHENS, GA - In breaking news to GomerBlog, the first batch of crying July 1st interns were spotted in a rarely used stairwell at...

Medical Professions as NFL Teams

0
Anesthesia is the Cincinnati Bengals: no one knows anyone on the team; they rotate so often it’s not worth learning names anyway.   Orthopaedics are the...
female physician

Physician Still Hasn’t Received Her Big-Pharma Payout

0
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Newly-minted attending physician, Dr. Lindsay Moliarty, has a pile of bills to pay: $200,000 in student loans that has accrued...