Pediatrics

La Leche League Busted for Trafficking Cocaine in Confiscated Similac Containers

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CHICAGO, IL - Yesterday, the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) announced that it is making hundreds of arrests after blowing the flexible, Frisbee-style lid off...

Prior Authorization Now Requires Prior Authorization

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WASHINGTON, DC - Prior authorization - the time-sink, inefficient, and soul-sucking process used by health insurance agencies to determine and eventually deny coverage for...

Medical Professions as NFL Teams

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Anesthesia is the Cincinnati Bengals: no one knows anyone on the team; they rotate so often it’s not worth learning names anyway.   Orthopaedics are the...
googling medical symptoms

Study: 4th Graders with Google Better Doctors Than 96% of New Medical Student Graduates

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - A new study published last week in Barney and Friends magazine revealed that 4th graders, if given a computer with internet search access, were...
mosquito

ToRCHeS Mnemonic Unsure How to Handle New Zika Virus

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For decades the ToRCHeS mnemonic (Toxoplasma, Rubella, Cytomegalovirus, HIV, Herpes, Syphilis) was the saving grace of every medical, nursing, biology, virology, pharmacology, zoology and frenology...

Paediatricians Add An “A” To Specialty In Attempt To Improve Earning Potential

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ORLANDO, FL - In his opening remarks at the American Academy of Paediatrics annual meeting AAP President, Dr. Kyle Yasuda, announced that the specialty...

Local Mom Decides Against New Brake Pads

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MICHIGAN - Local mom, Jennifer Leeders, brought in her Acura MDX for its annual maintenance.  Her mechanic recommended new brake pads, a routine recommendation....
clown doctor

Doctor Finds New Life As A Clown More Fulfilling

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Pediatrician Jim Smith is thrilled with his new career as a professional Clown. He specializes in children’s birthday parties but has the skill set...

Vaping Company Denies New Breastmilk-Flavored E-Cigarette Targets Newborn

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SEATTLE, WA—A Seattle-based vaping company has been forced into damage control amidst claims that its new e-cigarette targets newborns. The basis for the claims...