Pediatrics

CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC Reminder: ‘Sleep Tight and Definitely Do Not Let the Bed Bugs Bite’

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ATLANTA, GA - Tonight, shortly after reading the public a bedtime story, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) wanted to say "Good night!"...

New Concierge Pediatrics Office Won’t Turn Away Any Kids with Money

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GREENWICH, CT—Piggybacking off the successful concierge medicine practices that have sprung up over the last two decades, a local pediatrician, Dr. Willis Cornwallis, has...
Instant Pot

Mother More Emotionally Attached to Instant Pot Than Newborn Baby

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AUSTIN, TX - Gomerblog has learned that Jenna Barley, a first-time mother who gave birth to a beautiful young baby girl just two weeks...

Entrance of New Children’s Hospital to Feature Adorable Animal Footprints Leading Families Directly to...

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DALLAS, TX - As construction continues on the new 300-bed children’s hospital here, officials today announced some exciting design details to the general public.  According...
upset mother

Mother Furious With OB Nurse Who Mispronounced Her Baby’s Name

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PORTLAND, OR - "Simply Outrageous!"  Those were comments on a patient survey card by a mother regarding an OB nurse at Mercy Care Hospital yesterday on the 6th floor. ...
surgeon biopsy malignant fusion

Surgery Residents Bring Other MDs to Work for a Day

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5:00 am: Arrive at hospital. Peds and Psych are borderline comatose still. Medicine seems confused to find that the hospital lights work this early in...
anti vaccine brain

Mutations in the Anti-Vaxxers’ Brain Discovered

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Scientists have made a major breakthrough in understanding the brain functions of anti-vaccine proponents (anti-vaxxers).  Mutations in the Y74 gene encode for these transformations.  Environmental...
umbilical stump

Citing Health Benefits, New Parents Eating Umbilical Cord Stumps

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“From the moment I gazed into Andromeda’s perfect eyes, I knew I wanted only the best for her,” says new mom Rochelle Wilson. “Her...
Vegas Urology Show

Urology & Pediatric Departments Gearing Up for Annual ‘Circ du Soleil’

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LAS VEGAS, NV - The Urology and Pediatric Departments at Las Vegas Regional are diligently preparing to host the 6th Annual "Circ du Soleil" extravaganza...

“Rare Diseases” Give Jenny McCarthy Lifetime Achievement Award

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Thursday night the 197,788th annual Rare Disease Awards - formally known as the Common Disease Awards - brought the house down at...