Pediatrics

umbilical stump

Citing Health Benefits, New Parents Eating Umbilical Cord Stumps

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“From the moment I gazed into Andromeda’s perfect eyes, I knew I wanted only the best for her,” says new mom Rochelle Wilson. “Her...
childhood obesity

New Product Release: Pediatric Power Chair for Morbidly Obese Children

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WHITE PLAINS, NY - In a shrewd but brilliant marketing move last week, Hoveranywhere announced plans to sell thousands of "smaller-sized" pediatric power chairs. The chairs are...
ADHD

Pediatric Community Stunned When Patient Brings Back Vanderbilt Forms for ADHD Evaluation

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LECOMA, MO - After being seen in the clinic about a week ago for chronic behavioral outburst, a local 9-year-old boy and his parents...

Physician Recruitment Ad Statements and What They Really Mean

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Ad text Actual meaning Established medical center is a state of the art, modern, newly renovated hospital   The MRI works 12 hours out of the week, and...

Female Doctors Now Required to Show ID During Flight Emergencies

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ATLANTA, GA - Delta Airlines announced that "all female physicians will need to show identification during an in-flight emergency."  They are coming off of...

Parent Uses Landmark Paper ‘No Difference in Scrape Healing Placebo Vs. Band-Aid’ Without Success

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OMAHA, NE - Local resident Amy Shoemaker has tried to inform her children over and over that Band-Aids applied to only superficial wounds make...

Pediatrician About to Call Surgery to Lay Hands on Another Punky-Looking Kiddo

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2AM, KNOXVILLE, TN - According to seventh floor pediatrics ward sources, local pediatrician and hospitalist Dr. Jerry Dirkins is about to call for another...

New Concierge Pediatrics Office Won’t Turn Away Any Kids with Money

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GREENWICH, CT—Piggybacking off the successful concierge medicine practices that have sprung up over the last two decades, a local pediatrician, Dr. Willis Cornwallis, has...

Medical Specialties as Game of Thrones Characters

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As all medical specialties try to gain control of the hospital, we've narrowed down who their characters are: Cardiology, you poor tortured soul with a...