Narconipple Implant Helps Add Opioids to Breastfeeding
SEATTLE, WA - Narconipple Inc. is pleased to introduce its revolutionary patented product, the Fentanypple. The Fentanypple is a narcotic breast implant that delivers...
Tips: How to Treat a Pager That Keeps Going Off Like It Has Seizures
Sadly, despite all the technological advances we've made, a good portion of health care professionals still carry an object as archaic and arguably less...
Surgeon General: Generation of Adults, Unwisely Formula-Fed as Infants, Should Start Getting Breastfed Now
WASHINGTON, DC—Mrs. Beaumont came home early one day last week and walked in on her 50-year-old husband sucking on the nipple of a gorgeous...
Formula Reviews by Former NICU Babies
“Similac Pro-Advance, complete nutrition for a baby’s first year… with added a 2’-FL Human Milk Oligosaccharide…an immune-nourishing prebiotic that circulates through the body,” –...
Medical Professions as NFL Teams
Anesthesia is the Cincinnati Bengals: no one knows anyone on the team; they rotate so often it’s not worth learning names anyway.
Orthopaedics are the...
Disney Parks Now Require Immunization Record for Admittance
ORLANDO, FL - In a bold and unprecedented response to the recent measles outbreak at Disneyland, Disney execs announced yesterday that they will institute...
100-Year-Old Finally Ready for Discharge from NICU
CENTENNIAL, CO—Yesterday, a 1200-month-old newborn, Sandy Genarian, was finally discharged from the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit of Centennial Medical Center, where he has been...
SHITSTORM Red Flag Phrases During Patient Turnover
DJIBOUTI, DJIBOUTI - The 5th annual Seminar of Hospital Internists Technologists Surgeons Traumatologists Others RNs and More (SHITSTORM) convention resulted in the drafting of...
Breaking: Ummm Yeah, Fifty Bucks Says This Kid’s Going into Ortho
MIAMI, FL - Without waiting to see how his prepubescent, teenage, or even college years pan out, Gomerblog is already going to call it: fifty...
Physician Recruitment Ad Statements and What They Really Mean
Ad text
Actual meaning
Established medical center is a state of the art, modern, newly renovated hospital
The MRI works 12 hours out of the week, and...