Patient Can’t Pronounce Metoprolol, Electively Intubated
RICHMOND, VA - Patient Mary Andrews, a 52-year-old female with atrial fibrillation tried to pronounce the beta blocker “metoprolol” earlier this morning. She found...
Pyxis Machine Dispenses Broken Glass Dilaudid Ampule, Laughs on the Inside
CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA - GomerBlog brings breaking news regarding those fragile glass fentanyl and Dilaudid ampules in the Pyxis machine. Apparently the machine enjoys dispensing medications with a...
Hospital Renamed “Our Lady of Perpetual Shortage”
In honor of recent supply chain deficiencies, FDA recalls, as well as loss of manufacturing capabilities from recent environmental disasters in Puerto Rico and...
Horse Veterinarian-Turned-Physician Prescribing Too Many Large Pills and Euthanasia
BALTIMORE, MD – Former top equine veterinarian for race horses and now turned top physician, Dr. Zack Berger of Johns Hopkins, has been called out...
Drug Shortages Lead OR Pharmacies to Issue Motivational Items
Nationwide drug shortages have forced physicians to consider alternative ways to take care of patients. At the forefront of this movement is the National...
Patient Dies When Nurse Unable To Scan Epinephrine Vial at Code
FORT WAYNE, IN - A nurse’s worst nightmare occurred tonight at Lincoln Memorial Hospital in Fort Wayne. A code blue was called overhead and...
New Dating Website ‘Just Pharmacists’ Proven to Reduce Cardiomyopathy
For many a lonely pharmacist, the only drug in critical shortage is love. Now, thanks to the makers of such successes as Ashley Madison,...
Physician Shocked to Learn Banana Bags Not Made with Real Fruit
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Local hospitalist Marcel Beignet was shocked and aghast to learn from colleagues today that banana bags, which are used to...
Local Doctor Consults Sauron to Create the One Pill to Cure Them All
“I was at my wits’ end with these chronic pain patients,” Local doctor Fro Doe told reporters. “They keep coming in over and over...
Breaking News: Orthopod Catches Dosing Error
BOSTON, MA - Rotating Orthopedics 4th year resident, Dr. Brandt Sullivan, caught a medication error at Boston Children’s Hospital two nights ago. Dr. Sullivan...