Pharmacy

pills

Makers of Dilaudid to Officially Change Name to ‘That One That Starts with a...

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a stunning move the makers of Dilaudid (hydromorphone) have officially changed their product name to “That One That Starts with...

Local Doctor Consults Sauron to Create the One Pill to Cure Them All

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“I was at my wits’ end with these chronic pain patients,” Local doctor Fro Doe told reporters. “They keep coming in over and over...

Tips: How to Pronounce a Difficult Drug Name Without Choking, Aspirating, Dying

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Last month, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (“The” FDA) approved the efficacious and unpronounceable idarucizumab (also known, thankfully, as Praxbind) to reverse the...

New Drug Company “Big Pharma” releases full range of Placebos

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Despite being one of the most studied medications there has never been a range of placebos released onto the market. The newly launched Pharmaceutical...
Martin Shkreli

Things You Should Know About Martin Shkreli

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CEO of Turing Pharmaceuticals Martin Shkreli raised the price of Daraprim, a drug used in the treatment of toxoplasmosis, from $13.50 to $750 per...
homeopathy

Homeopathic Drug Rep No More Effective Than Placebo, New Study Finds

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A new study published by the University of South Pennington shows that Homeopathic drug reps are no more effective at convincing homeopaths to use...
Bananas

Physician Shocked to Learn Banana Bags Not Made with Real Fruit

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - Local hospitalist Marcel Beignet was shocked and aghast to learn from colleagues today that banana bags, which are used to...
Gas-X brain farts

Neurologists Recommend Gas-X for Treatment of Brain Farts

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MINNEAPOLIS, MN - The American Academy of Neurology (AAN) has updated their guidelines for the diagnosis and management of brain farts, a condition characterized...
dilaudid

Report: Nurse on 3rd Floor Excited to Give 0.1 mg of Dilaudid

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CHICAGO, IL – Local nurse Melissa Jacobson’s shift just got better when she noticed what was written for pain medication on her patient. “Oh,...
pharmacy

Doctorate of Pharmacy Programs to Add CVS, Walgreens Rewards Card Education Requirement

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WASHINGTON, DC - As a result of successful congressional lobbying efforts by the “big corner drug store” lobby, doctorate of pharmacy programs nationwide will...