Pharmacy

dilaudid

Report: Nurse on 3rd Floor Excited to Give 0.1 mg of Dilaudid

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CHICAGO, IL – Local nurse Melissa Jacobson’s shift just got better when she noticed what was written for pain medication on her patient. “Oh,...
drug shortages

Drug Shortages Lead OR Pharmacies to Issue Motivational Items

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Nationwide drug shortages have forced physicians to consider alternative ways to take care of patients. At the forefront of this movement is the National...
colored prescription pills

Medical School to Replace Pharmacology Course with Coloring Books

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In a school-wide email to faculty and students, Dean Giles announced the introduction of a new course replacing existing pharmacology classes. Stating that patients are...

Shark Attack Victim Denied Narcotics

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PENSACOLA BEACH, FL - Skip Sanders alternated between spearfishing and surfing, depending on the waves.  Yesterday, an errant harpoon from his spear gun grazed...
crocodile moat

Red Line in Medication Room Replaced with Crocodile-Filled Moat

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BOSTON, MA - Any nurse who has dispensed medications knows the ubiquitous red line, in the medication room, near the Pyxis machine.  This is a...
afternoon after

FDA Approves Afternoon-After Pill

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INTERCOURSE, PA - “Let’s face it: no one is getting up in the morning after an accident,” said a representative from the Food and Drug Administration...
cancer drug

Cancer Drug Delayed 2 Years Due to Licensing Deal

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Boston, MA – Astra-Nomical has delayed their wonder cancer drug, Fizamax (ferazepatab), again. This time up to 2 years because of promotional disputes. “We were...
Martin Shkreli

Things You Should Know About Martin Shkreli

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CEO of Turing Pharmaceuticals Martin Shkreli raised the price of Daraprim, a drug used in the treatment of toxoplasmosis, from $13.50 to $750 per...

Patient Holding $1000 new iPhone X Very Upset About $5 Prescription CoPay

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LA JOLLA, CA – Natalia Miller could not understand what the idiots at the La Jolla Primary Care Clinic and Botox Salon didn’t get...

Dr. Oz is Right: “The Miracle Pill” is for Real

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A world-renowned TV celebrity physician Dr. Oz unraveled the mystery behind “The Miracle Pill.”  “This sh** is for real,” says Dr. Oz while throwing...