Patient Can’t Pronounce Metoprolol, Electively Intubated

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RICHMOND, VA - Patient Mary Andrews, a 52-year-old female with atrial fibrillation tried to pronounce the beta blocker “metoprolol” earlier this morning.  She found...
productive cough

Getting Things Done: Cough Quite Productive Today

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HUNTSVILLE, AL - Checking off its To Do list like it's nobody else's business, patient Reynold Baker's cough is happy to report that it...
respiratory ventilator attachment

New Ventilator Attachment Safely Allows Smoking While Receiving Oxygen

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CHARLOTTE, NC - Bronco Products, Inc. is pleased to announce its revolutionary new ventilation product.  PapPal is an amazingly simple device that allows those...
endotracheal tube cough suppressant

Musical Endotracheal Tubes Brighten Up ICU

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Intensive care units (ICU) are notoriously grim environments, filled with scenes of grief and worry.  But thanks to a new...
respiratory system secedes capacity

Respiratory System Secedes, Declares Independence from Human Body

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THE HUMAN BODY - In a stunning development that will inevitably alter the balance of power within us all, the respiratory system has successfully...
ventilator

Ventilator More Effective When Connected to Endotracheal Tube

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KEARNEY, NE - It was a close call for Kind Humanitarian Hospital's Dr. Dan G. Ross of when his ventilated patient started to desaturate....
map my couch app

Map My Couch App Released in Response to Map My Run App

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In response to the numerous Map My Run and other workout posts that inundate newsfeeds on Facebook, a psychology group out of Houston TX...
santa claus stuck

Santa Claus In Serious Condition After Chimney Incident & Sleep Apnea Complications

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THE NORTH POLE - GomerBlog can confirm that Santa Claus is recovering, but remains in serious condition, at North Pole Community Hospital after an incident when...

Intern Inadvertently Orders Negative Pressure Ventilation; Patient Placed in Iron Lung

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DALLAS, TX - While placing orders on rounds, intern TooMany Orders clicked over to the Respiratory section in the hospital’s surprisingly thorough EMR. The...
Radiology scanner

Tip: If You Need to Extubate Patient, Send to Radiology

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PITTSBURGH, PA – Hope Mercy ICU is starting a new policy that if you need your patient extubated just send them to radiology. "Usually when...