20 Out of 10 Medical Providers Annoyed by Patients’ Misuse of Pain Scales
ATLANTA, GA - According to a new study by the Centers for Pain Control & Other Nonsense (CPCON), a whopping 20 out of 10...
Retina Specialist to Further Subspecialize and Focus on Cones
NEW YORK, NY - Realizing that the ophthalmologic world of retina is still way too vast with its ten layers, retina specialist Jacob Vitreous has...
Intern Spotted Rounding with Tip Jar, Asking for Spare Change
PITTSBURGH, PA - Medicine intern Randy McMichael has been trying to make his measly paycheck last each month. Despite making the usual sacrifices -...
Soccer Mom Heals Femur Fracture with Herbs, Essential Oils
ORANGE, CA - Mrs. Stephanie Holmestown experienced what all parents fear while watching their kids play sports; her eleven-year-old son Andrew collided with another player...
Know Your White Coats
The physician white coat comes with a strong sense of entitlement. At $3,000 tuition per square inch, this is the most expensive coat that also...
American Nurses Association Approves Call Lights with Lockout Intervals
SILVER SPRING, MD - In an effort to bolster nursing satisfaction, the American Nurses Association (ANA) have unanimously approved the replacement of current call...
ASA Updates Algorithm to Account for Redheads
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - The American Society of Anesthesiologists (ASA) released new guidelines that update their infamous ASA classification system to account for the anesthetic...
Devious MRSA Spider Bites Yet Another Antecubital Fossa, Remains at Large
GASTONIA, NC - Following an all-too-familiar recent theme, a new patient was assaulted last week by a psychotic spider rampaging through the South.
Earl Wayne...
American Red Cross Creates American Brown Cross for Fecal Transplant Donations
WASHINGTON, DC - Despite increasing clinician awareness and education as well as instituting universal gloving procedures, hospital-associated Clostridium difficile infections have continued to be...
Trump: Anesthesiology Will Build Border Drape Wall & Pay for It
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Publicly acknowledging that efforts to build a border wall and have Mexico pay for it has failed, President Donald Trump has...