Local Organic Mom Pleased to Have All Natural, Antibiotic-Susceptibility-Free Infection
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Local organic mom, Fern Meadow, is pleased that her life-threatening leg infection is pandrug-resistant.
“When I spiked a fever and saw red streaks going up my leg I didn’t want to go...
Greek Hero Achilles: ‘Help! Can I Get a Podiatrist, STAT?!’
ANCIENT TROY - Gomerblog has just learned that Achilles, the Greek hero who cemented his status by slaying Hector during the Trojan War, has just been shot in the heel by Paris' poisoned arrow, and...
CDC: Stop Using Purulent Speculums as Tongue Depressors
ATLANTA, GA - Disturbed by a surge in case reports driven by medical providers who are either short on equipment or just extremely lazy, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has issued...
IM Doc Goes on Fishing Trip, Plans to Get Rheum on Board
CHARLESTON, SC - Local Internal Medicine physician Randy Kitts was headed out on a fishing trip Saturday when he realized before he set course he should "probably get Rheum on board."
"Well, the waters are...
Confused Michael Flynn Requests Immunity from CDC, Immunizations from Senate Intelligence Committee
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Several health care and congressional sources have informed Gomerblog that they believe former National Security Advisor Michael Flynn is very confused and perhaps altered, as he keeps requesting immunity from the Centers for Disease...
Two Examples of Amazingly Subpar Lumbar Puncture Procedure Notes
Amazingly Subpar Lumbar Puncture Procedure Note #1
Procedure:
This is Spinal Tap.
Date/Time:
Optional.
Indication:
Infectious Diseases said it was a good idea.
Resident:
Dr. Kyle Richter, PGY-1.
Attending:
Yes.
A time-out was completed to verify the correct patient, procedure, and when the cafeteria closes. ...
CDC Recommends Against Licking Eyeballs
ATLANTA, GA - Say it isn't so! The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has just announced that it cannot and will not recommend against the licking of eyeballs, thus delivering a devastating...
Breaking: Anti-Vaxxers Refusing Cooties Shot
ATLANTA, GA - Gomerblog has just learned that the anti-vaccination (or anti-vaxxer) movement has now pledged to refuse vaccination against the cooties, this on the heels of a recent Centers for Disease Control and...
Breaking: CDC Warns of Cooties Outbreak in Children
ATLANTA, GA - Parents pay close attention: The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has issued a new warning to the American public against a possible cooties outbreak in children under the age of...
Powerful New Hand Dryer Can Dry, Detach Hands in 8 Seconds
EAST LONGMEADOW, MA - Manufacturer of XLERATOR hand dryers, Excel Dryer, has announced that it has produced their most powerful hand dryer yet, called the SEVERATOR, which can not only dry hands in 8...