Monday, May 6, 2024

Primary Care

Mayo Secretly Celebrates New #1 Status After Cleveland Clinic Comes Out Anti-Vax

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ROCHESTER, MN - The Mayo Clinic recently held a campus-wide party this weekend full of "Number 1" balloons and cakes that said "Mayo #1".  These were held after Cleveland Clinic promoted anti-vaccination (or anti-vax)....

Product Review: Littman’s Cordless Stethoscope

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Pros: Portable stethoscope capable of listening to human organ noises.  No battery required! Cons: The cordless nature of the device means you have no excuse not to listen to your patient's heart and lungs. Littman’s new...

Hollywood Good Guy Matt Damon Opens Up About EBV Positivity

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NEW YORK, NY - Matt Damon shocked medically illiterate TV viewers on Friday morning’s Today Show when he confirmed that he is positive for the Epstein Barr virus.  It is unclear when the actor,...

Narc Madness

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It's that time of year, time to pick your favorite narcotic and see if it will make it to the final 4!  This year the bracket has expanded to include all of the pain...
atls by medical specialty

Do You Know Your ABCs by Subspecialty?

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CHICAGO, IL – The American College of Surgeons (ACS) released new subspecialty-focused primary survey guidelines for Advanced Trauma Life Support (ATLS) this week after a panel review at the recent national meeting. “With no major...

Doctor Excited to Get New, Last Year’s People Magazine for Waiting Room

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NAPERVILLE, IL - Dr. Nyugen's waiting room will be packed when word gets out they have the country's most-recent People magazine.  "I'm trying it keep it a little under wraps right now," Dr. Ken...

NBC Changes Policy, Allows Women to be Portrayed as Mothers or Doctors

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NEW YORK, NY – In yet another in a long line of knee-jerk reactions to public relations nightmares, NBC President Jeff Zucker announced that NBC has reversed their long-standing policy against acknowledging that woman...
dr evil

Pharmaceutical Company Buys Out Another 20 Generic Drugs, Decides to Raise Drug Prices to…...

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DAYTON, OH - CEO of Turing Pharmaceuticals Martin Shkreli made another bold announcement today that his pharmaceutical company has now bought rights for 20 more generic medications used by over 150 million Americans afflicted with...
hospital emergency room boarding

‘Twas the Night After Christmas

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'Twas the Night After Christmas ‘Twas the night after Christmas, at the front of the house, The parents were lined up, all running their mouths. Neb tubing was hung from the med cart with care For all of...

Physician Recruitment Ad Statements and What They Really Mean

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Ad text Actual meaning Established medical center is a state of the art, modern, newly renovated hospital   The MRI works 12 hours out of the week, and the cost of that new fountain in the lobby will...