Surgery

Breaking News: Da Vinci Robot Becomes Sentient, Terrorizes City

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NEW YORK, NY - In breaking news, NYU's da Vinci Surgical Robot became sentient earlier this morning and started to rebel against its human masters. "It's...
ophthalmologist

Ophthalmologist Accidentally Agrees to See Inpatient Consult

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Richard Thompson, a local ophthalmologist, was appalled to discover that he had accidentally agreed to see a patient currently admitted to local Mercy Hospital...

Staff Not a Fan of New Antisocial Worker

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PASADENA, CA - Medical staff have told GomerBlog early this morning that they are not a big fan of new antisocial worker, Timothy Pyro,...

Thousands Dead in Battle Between Ophthalmologists and Optometrists

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WASHINGTON, DC - Thousands of eye care providers were found dead in the streets Monday morning after a vicious battle erupted between ophthalmologists and...
orthopedic surgeons

Orthopod Cuts Patient Load by Telling Them the Truth

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PEMBROKE PINES, FL - In an amazing feat of political incorrectness, an orthopaedic surgeon cut his clinic volume of non-operative patients by half by simply...
new medical app

Surgeon Time Finally Debunked with New App

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"How much longer?" anesthesia will ask.  "Only about an hour or so," a typical surgeon might answer.  Then anesthesia is forced to ask themselves,...
menu book

Book of Delivery Menus Missing, 20 Night Nurses & Doctors Die of Hunger

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AUGUSTA, GA - Medical personnel, patients, and families at Augusta Medical Center (AMC) are in mourning this morning as 20 night nurses and physicians...

Cardiothoracic Surgeon Identifies as Medical Student, Crushes Surgery Rotation

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When asked if she felt like she had an unfair advantage against clearly weaker competition, Dr. Beer was unapologetic. “I felt like a student in my heart so I was just living my true self.”

Poll Reveals Most Attending Surgeons Secretly Jealous About 80-Hour Work Week

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EGAN, ND - A poll of practicing surgeons at the recent Society of Magnificent Surgeons meeting revealed that 92% of those polled were secretly...

Orthopedic Surgeon Floods OR During Shoulder Arthroscopy

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OMAHA, NE - Officials from Hamton Hospital may have to implement new policies after an orthopedic surgeon inadvertently flooded out the operating room during...