Hospital Administrators Chastise Emergency, Surgical & Medical Staff for Patient Satisfaction Scores Lagging Behind...
BOCA RATON, FL - Staff from three departments - Emergency, Surgery & Internal Medicine - received scathing criticism from hospital administrators at today's monthly meeting...
Breaking: Surgeon Sets OR Temperature to Absolute Zero (-273.15° Celsius)
MIAMI, FL - General surgeon Thomas Rauch has entered into the Surgery Hall of Fame (SHOF) today after setting the temperature in his operating...
Op Note: ‘Successful Despite Complete Blood Loss’
BIRMINGHAM, AL - With the exception of complete and total blood loss, today's routine total left hip arthroplasty was a resounding success devoid of...
Near Death Experience for Medical Student After Taking Chart During Change of Shift
MILWAUKEE, WI - Richard Henning, a third-year medical student, has no idea how close he came to perishing at Memorial Hospital yesterday. At approximately 7:04 a.m.,...
FDA Approves First Antibiotic/Male Impotence Drug: Mycoxaflopin
WASHINGTON, DC - The Federal Drug Administration has recently approved the first medication that will combat both bacterial infections and male impotence. Mycoxaflopin, a...
New Ophthalmology Intern Not Sure How to Spell Ophthalmology
IOWA CITY, IA - It was a rough start to the year for first-year ophthalmology resident Tony Beamer, who was recently caught trying to spell "ophthalmology," the name of...
Charting is Independent Risk Factor for DVT and PE, Study Finds
ROCHESTER, MN - Recognizing it is a form of immobilization in which health care professionals are unable to move around much, a study newly published...
Patriotic Call Lights, Pagers to Play National Anthem
WASHINGTON, DC - For those patients and providers in the nation's hospitals today, new special edition patriotic call lights, IV pumps, and pagers are...
Hospital Replaces Anesthesiologists with Voice-Activated OR Tables, Saves Millions
SAN JOSE, CA - In what appears to be a medical first, surgeons at Methodist Northwest Hospital have found that using voice-activated operating room...
Crooked Hillary Actually Suffering From Severe Scoliosis
CHAPPAQUA, NY - Former Democratic Presidential Candidate Hillary Clinton’s Spine Surgeon today revealed that President Donald Trump’s calling her “Crooked Hillary” on the campaign...