Colorectal

Colorectal surgery satire articles

garden gnome

Study: 90% Of Rectal Foreign Bodies Are Idiopathic

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - A recent retrospective review of Birmingham, Alabama confirms that 90% of rectal foreign bodies are idiopathic.  Colorectal surgeon Joshua P Dengle...
recto-retriever

Recto-Retriever Approved for Personal Use

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COLUMBIA, SC - Proctologic Inc. announces the release of its new product, the Recto-Retriever.  The Recto-Retriever is an amazing, thrilling, and versatile tool that...

SpaceX Announces Self-Retrieving Video Capsule Endoscopy

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Elon Musk’s rocket company SpaceX announced Tuesday that it will be entering the medical device market with the roll out of the Falciform 9,...
colon run a new scope

Inside Peak at Star Wars: A New Scope

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Gomerblog has got its hands on a leaked screenshot from the latest upcoming Star Wars standalone film.  Though little is known...
screening for cancer

TSA to Start Screening for Colorectal Cancer at Airports

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ATLANTA, GA – U.S. government officials said on Thursday that they would start screening patients for unintentional weight loss and bloody stools, starting with...

Bernie Sanders’ Hernia Likely Caused by Strain of Attempting to Lift Up Middle Class

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WASHINGTON, D.C. – A source close to the colorectal surgeon who treated Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders for an abdominal hernia this week said...
meatball sub

New Extreme weight loss surgery: total gastric intestinal bypass

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All that “digestion and absorption is so overrated” Weight loss surgery has gained popularity, although success rates are no where near 100%. Patients have been...

Endangered VA System Named 60th U.S. National Park

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to preserve one of the United States' most endangered areas for future generations, President Obama signed a law...

Doctor, Patient Miscommunicate: Doc Recommends Mayo Clinic, Patient Unfortunately Hears “Mayo Colonic”

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ROCHESTER, MN—Patients don’t always comprehend what their doctors tell them whether it’s due to language barriers, hearing difficulties or the use of complex medical...
radiologist reading

Radiologist Reports His Dictations in Haiku Form

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Dr. Gerald Wong, a veteran radiologist with 5 months before his retirement, was interviewed yesterday by E.J. Weekly on how his new style of...