Colorectal

Colorectal surgery satire articles

Fancy Medical Terms and What They Really Mean

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Nurses and doctors use fancy words to communicate and sound smart before patients, families and each other. Having spent most of his adult life...
confused doctor

Attending Physician Stranded in Clinic Without a Resident: A Tale of Survival

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ST. LOUIS, MO – It was 9 AM on a Thursday morning and each clinic room was full in Dr. Tone’s colorectal clinic. “Sir, the...
rectal exam glove

Rectal Exam Nuisance: New Product Changing the Way We Look at Cheeks

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MIAMI, FL - A new product by Telameto Corporation has emergency practitioners cheering for joy.  The inefficiencies of the rectal exam will quickly be...

Endangered VA System Named 60th U.S. National Park

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to preserve one of the United States' most endangered areas for future generations, President Obama signed a law...
abdomen

NIH Close to Uncovering Elusive Fifth Abdominal Quadrant

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BETHESDA, MD - Sensing a breakthrough is imminent, scientists at the National Institutes of Health (NIH) have publicly announced they are indeed very close...
pot of coffee

Maroon 5 Admitted to Hospital with 5 Maroon Stools

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Maroon 5 is hospitalized at UCLA Medical Center after collectively experiencing 5 maroon-colored stools, including lead singer and NBC’s The...
colonoscopy

Hamburglar Diagnosed with Colon Cancer

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MCDONALDLAND - In sad news today, the Hamburglar, who amused children for years with his antics and unstoppable desire for hamburgers, was diagnosed with...
disposable colonoscope

Product Review: Melch Allyn’s Disposable Colonoscopes

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Pros / You don't have to worry about those hard-to-remove stains like on reusable colonoscopes because the Melch Allyn Disposable Colonoscope can be thrown...

Mom Still Cleaning Up After Surgeon Son

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NAPLES, FL - A recent phenomenon in an operating room (OR) at Mary Mother Hospital has caught quite the buzz.  Dr. Roger Messi was...

Badass Surgeon Performs Whipple While in Tuxedo

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AUSTIN, TX - The bar for badassery has been raised a notch, so surgeons take note: veteran general surgeon Bob Cooper has just completed...