Colorectal

Colorectal surgery satire articles

Endangered VA System Named 60th U.S. National Park

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to preserve one of the United States' most endangered areas for future generations, President Obama signed a law...
disposable colonoscope

Product Review: Melch Allyn’s Disposable Colonoscopes

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Pros / You don't have to worry about those hard-to-remove stains like on reusable colonoscopes because the Melch Allyn Disposable Colonoscope can be thrown...
colonoscopy

Breaking: Gastroenterologist Thinks Patient is Full of Sh*t

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COOKEVILLE, TN - A local gastroenterologist by the name of Baxter Jones completely shocked patient Mason Watts and his family when he flat out...

Proctologists Have Record 2015, as Many Were Butthurt on the Internet

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The National Association of Proctologists (NAP) reported record profits for proctologists in 2015 as an unprecedented number of people were butthurt from internet-related postings....

Conversation Starters While Scrubbing For Surgery with Your Attending

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Scrubbing before surgery can be an awkward time for residents who have to spend up to 5 uninterrupted minutes standing next to an attending...

Fancy Medical Terms and What They Really Mean

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Nurses and doctors use fancy words to communicate and sound smart before patients, families and each other. Having spent most of his adult life...
abdomen

NIH Close to Uncovering Elusive Fifth Abdominal Quadrant

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BETHESDA, MD - Sensing a breakthrough is imminent, scientists at the National Institutes of Health (NIH) have publicly announced they are indeed very close...

Mom Still Cleaning Up After Surgeon Son

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NAPLES, FL - A recent phenomenon in an operating room (OR) at Mary Mother Hospital has caught quite the buzz.  Dr. Roger Messi was...

Medical Researcher Belatedly Realizes His Paper Was Published in The Anals of Internal Medicine

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DES MOINES, IA – With dawning horror, local medical researcher Dr. Clint Malloy realized he had been mistaken to believe his recent paper was accepted...
recto-retriever

Recto-Retriever Approved for Personal Use

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COLUMBIA, SC - Proctologic Inc. announces the release of its new product, the Recto-Retriever.  The Recto-Retriever is an amazing, thrilling, and versatile tool that...