Mom Still Cleaning Up After Surgeon Son
NAPLES, FL - A recent phenomenon in an operating room (OR) at Mary Mother Hospital has caught quite the buzz. Dr. Roger Messi was...
Unprepared Patient Cramming for Tomorrow’s Rectal Exam
AUBURN, AL - Forever the procrastinator, nervous and unprepared patient Johnny Sanders has started cramming for tomorrow's rectal exam in the hopes he can...
Amidst Obesity Epidemic, Task Force Creates Glasgow Food Coma Scale
ATLANTA, GA - In response to the public health crisis of food comas resulting from the ongoing obesity epidemic, the 3N Joint Task Force,...
TSA to Start Screening for Colorectal Cancer at Airports
ATLANTA, GA – U.S. government officials said on Thursday that they would start screening patients for unintentional weight loss and bloody stools, starting with...
SpaceX Announces Self-Retrieving Video Capsule Endoscopy
Elon Musk’s rocket company SpaceX announced Tuesday that it will be entering the medical device market with the roll out of the Falciform 9,...
Doctor, Patient Miscommunicate: Doc Recommends Mayo Clinic, Patient Unfortunately Hears “Mayo Colonic”
ROCHESTER, MN—Patients don’t always comprehend what their doctors tell them whether it’s due to language barriers, hearing difficulties or the use of complex medical...
General Surgeon Moves Clinic to Operating Room, Cites Excessive Patient Consciousness
CEDAR RAPIDS, IA – Jacob Townsend, a 53-year-old general surgeon, has decided to permanently move his clinic to the operating room due to ongoing...
Radiologist Reports His Dictations in Haiku Form
Dr. Gerald Wong, a veteran radiologist with 5 months before his retirement, was interviewed yesterday by E.J. Weekly on how his new style of...
45-Year-Old EM Physician Reflects Back Upon 4.0 GPA in College While Manually Disimpacting Patient
PENDELTON, IN - Departmental Emergency Medicine Chief Dr. Glenn Henderson was seen staring off into space daydreaming on Monday morning, while digitally disimpacting a 90-year-old nursing home...
Barium Enema Reveals Abnormal Presence of Barium in the Colon
NEW YORK, NY - An inpatient medical team was shocked to learn that a barium enema performed earlier today revealed an abnormal presence of...