Orthopedics

orthopedic tools

Synthesis Introduces New Product Line, Instant Hit with Orthopaedic Surgeons

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CHESTER, PA - Orthopaedic instrument and implant manufacturer Synthesis recently introduced a new product line that has quickly become the most coveted product line...
ultrasound

Surgeon Performs In-Utero Tommy John Surgery

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KANSAS CITY – A surgeon in Kansas City reports he has performed the world’s first in-utero Tommy John surgery. A hospital spokesperson states that the...
Ancef pump

Orthopod Caught Auscultating Ancef Pump

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ATLANTA, GA - "Shhh," orthopedic surgeon Thor Hammersley told befuddled onlookers as he used a stethoscope (or, as he puts it, "a mini jump rope") to...
orthopedic surgeon orthopedics orthopaedics

How to Ace Your Ortho Residency Interview

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1. Know your favorite bone. Nothing looks worse for an applicant than showing up for the interview and not knowing what your favorite bone....
femurs

Orthopod Uses Patient’s Femurs to Play the Drums

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Orthopedic surgeon Jake Crusher came home today supremely excited: it was his day off and he just bought a brand new...

AAOS: Osteoporosis Renamed Bone Failure

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“Bone failure. It’s the new hotness. Now let’s start taking it seriously!”
upset mother

Mother Devastated to Learn Son’s Femur is Broken and Fractured

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WILLMAR, MN - Local mother, self-proclaimed Domestic Goddess, PTA President, and Essential Oils saleswoman Hilda Larson was absolutely crushed this past week when she...

Wuhan Virus Lab intern drank Coronavirus vials instead of Corona beer

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WUHAN, CHINA - Chinese officials just released footage that show a Wuhan Virus Lab intern pounding vial after vial of Coronavirus instead of his...
external fixator

Ortho Stabilizes Stethoscope with External Fixator

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Stating overwhelming concern over the flimsy nature of medicine colleague Louis Lefebvre's stethoscope, orthopedic surgeon Brock Hammersley has successfully stabilized...
ex fixed ex fix

Breaking News: Orthopod Places Ex Fix on Ex Fix

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SEATTLE, WA - Questioning if the external fixation device (or ex fix) placed on a patient’s leg is stable enough for the job, Harborview Medical...