This is a continuation from our first post: What “Thank You for the Interesting Consult” Really Means, Part 1. Let’s go!
Translation: Like it or not, I’m recommending a multivitamin.
Translation: Not another pelvic exam for today?! Sheesh!
Translation: You know PT and OT are different, right?
Translation: Please learn to spell “ophthalmology;” it has two H’s.
Translation: (1) I don’t have a case or clinic today or (2) Get some imaging next time, damn it! Chances are it’s the first translation. Orthopedic surgeons never use real words in their note, let alone full sentences. If real words are used instead of terms like WBAT, that orthopod probably isn’t busy.
Translation: People really need to stop picking their noses.
Translation: Should’ve consulted us six months ago.
Translation: I’ll do what I can to summon divine intervention.
Translation: Inadequate sample.
Translation: How on earth are you allowed to write prescriptions for patients?
Translation: Why did you consult us? This person’s been bedbound for a decade!
Translation: Yeah, we won’t be able to fix this one.
Psychology and Psychiatry
Translation: If you think this guy’s crazy, boy, do I have some stories for you.
Translation: This could be interesting, but let’s treat with steroids anyway.
Translation: Bet you didn’t expect these incidental findings.
Translation: Hate to disappoint you, but this is just osteoarthritis.
Translation: This patient won’t pass the modified barium swallow!
Translation: Genitals haunt me in my sleep.
Translation: Wow, I didn’t know an aorta could do that!