PALO ALTO, CA – A new dating site has received its initial funding, called RxCupid. The website tries to match the perfect patients together. They can share rides or even ambulances to the hospital.
Local Munchausen patient Ronald Miller was paired with hypochondriac Samantha Willard. “It’s perfect!” says Samantha. “I not only met my soulmate but my medical mate. We book appointments together, complain together, and spend 6 days a week in the ER together, it’s wonderful!”
Praise is coming from all areas: erectile dysfunction patient Charles D. was matched with chronic vaginal dryness Debbie S. “We are completely off our medications! Couldn’t be happier.”
A match made in pharmacy: chronic pain patient Henry F. found his 1 in a million Heather G. “I couldn’t believe it!” Henry told reporters. “The drug that starts with a ‘D’ only works for her too! WOW! What are those odds?” Heather also pointed out a great perk of their relationship: “When one of our pill bottles accidentally falls in the toilet or we get robbed and the only thing those thieves take are our pain pills, we can use our partner’s!”
Fibromyalgia patients are matching by the thousands. “We spend our nights posting on Facebook and fighting in the comment section. It’s great we never leave the couch!” said Fibro power couple George and Autumn.
The algorithm is pretty intense. If you have more than 12 allergies you will find a partner with those same allergies so you can keep all of those medications out of the house. RxCupid received a grant to offer all anti-vaxxer matches a one-way flight to a remote Pacific island.