Maker of EKG Pads Now Recommends 230-Lead EKGs for Patients

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FRIDLEY, MN - New studies are demonstrating that the more EKG leads a patient has, the more accurate the EKG is.  Previously, only 12...
Medical center

Medicine Changed Forever After Dr. Google Granted Prescriptive Authority

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Medicine will be changed forever after yesterday's ruling allowing online medical symptom checker sites, including Dr. Google, to prescribe medications. "We plan...

Patient Still 10/10 Pain Even After a ‘Being-Set-On-Fire’ Analogy

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NEWARK, NJ - Patient Deborah Skemp woke up today at 6:30 a.m. during rounds by her physician Dr. Waters.  He asked her the usual morning...
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Study: Red Wine in Moderation Good, in Excess Freaking Amazing

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ROCHESTER, MN - Wine enthusiasts bust out the Cabernet Sauvignon, Pinot Noir, and other red varietals, and get ready to celebrate!  An exciting new...
dilaudid

Report: Nurse on 3rd Floor Excited to Give 0.1 mg of Dilaudid

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CHICAGO, IL – Local nurse Melissa Jacobson’s shift just got better when she noticed what was written for pain medication on her patient. “Oh,...

Hospital Builds $100M Gorgeous Atrium Expansion, Nurse Bonuses Cut

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CLEVELAND, OH  – Mercy Hospital has just completed a new addition to their hospital: a grandiose beautiful atrium.  This new expansion is "a beautiful and...
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COVID-19 Update: Orthopods Suspend Bro Hugs for 60 Days

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NEW YORK, NY - First, Italy went on lockdown. Then March Madness was canceled; the NBA and NHL suspended their seasons. Now...

The Difference Between a Medical Student and a Deer in Headlights

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Today we help elucidate the differences between two things that are often mistaken for each other by healthcare providers. A deer in headlights is part...
abim

American Board of Internal Medicine on MOC: “Our Intern Got It Wrong”

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - On top of numerous changes, the American Board of Internal Medicine (ABIM) issued an apology to members of the internal medicine...

Guy on Motorcycle Looking Forward to Donating His Organs

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CALIFORNIA – Harris Jasper, a 3-year rider of a Kawasaki Ninja, or crotch rocket, told friends and family that this year would likely be the year...