plastic grabber

Colonoscopes Replaced by Plastic Reachers from Home Depot

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CHICAGO, IL - Hospital administrators are looking to tighten the pursestrings some more as they look to replace colonoscopes with plastic reachers & grabbers...
ER

Goop from ER Break Room Becomes Sentient, Asks for Dilaudid

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DALLAS, TX - In an amazing breakthrough for science, a new life form has spontaneously willed itself into existence in the break room of a...
hammer

Negligent Neurologist Tests Reflexes with Regular Hammer

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - A malpractice suit probably isn't very far around the corner for neurologist Brady Callahan, who attempted to elicit deep-tendon reflexes from...
surgery

New England Urologists Being Investigated for Deflated Balls

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BOSTON, MA - According to sources close to GomerBlog, an American Urological Association (AUA) investigation has found that 11 out of 12 balls belonging...
navy ship

Newly’Appointed ‘Ebola Czar’ Quarantines Entire Navy After Learning Ebola Can Be Transmitted by Semen

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In a bold first move since his recent appointment by President Obama as “Ebola Czar,” Ron Klain will quarantine the entire U.S....
blood pressure heart

Physical Exam Tips: The Heart

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In this series, we review the physical exam, the intermediate step in a patient evaluation that ultimately leads to imaging.  There are so many...
medicine resident

Graduating Resident Gives Finger to Every Attending in Department Before Leaving

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Dr. Will Chou, a graduating internal medicine resident, perfected his time management skills and was able to locate every single attending in his department...
taylor

Rapid Response Seizure Code Replaced with Taylor Swift’s ‘Shake It Off’

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ATLANTA, GA - Healthcare practitioners at Non-Stop Pop Medical Center (NSPMC) began the upgrade of their outdated emergency code system by replacing their pre-existing...

Breaking: Scott Pruitt Leaves EPA to Join Hospital Ethics Committee

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Donald J. Trump announced over Twitter this afternoon that Scott Pruitt will be leaving his leadership role as Administrator of...
United Airlines endotracheal tube

United Airlines Replaces Oxygen Masks with Endotracheal Tubes

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CHICAGO, IL - No stranger to controversy, United Airlines has thrown itself into the headlines once again by announcing that it will be replacing...