God Requires Prior Authorization Before Divine Intervention
HEAVEN ABOVE - Unfortunately for patient Lucas Von hopes for a cure have been put on hold as the ultimate provider of us all,...
5.8 Million Packers Fans Sign Up to Donate Their Clavicles to Aaron Rodgers
GREEN BAY, WI - After Aaron Rodgers went down in Sunday's game against the Minnesota Vikings (0 Super Bowl trophies in team history), Packers (5...
Zuckerberg Survives 10 Hours of Questions from First-Year Medical Student
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg survived 10 hours of questions, this time at the hands of first-year Georgetown medical student Savannah Hilton...
CDC Recommends Washing Hands for 30 Minutes Before, After Each Patient Encounter
ATLANTA, GA - Stating that health care professionals can do more to prevent the spread of germs, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention...
EMS Now Being Dispatched to Transport Satisfaction Surveys
HUNTERSVILLE, NC - Last week, emergency medical crews accepted a new challenge in this suburban North Carolina community. At the behest of health care...
Emergency Departments Implement New Triage Form to Screen Patients for Actual Disease
NEW YORK, NY - Myocardial infarction, subarachnoid hemorrhage, sepsis, diabetic ketoacidosis: these are examples of what the medical community regards as "real diseases." Unfortunately,...
Medical Researcher Belatedly Realizes His Paper Was Published in The Anals of Internal Medicine
DES MOINES, IA – With dawning horror, local medical researcher Dr. Clint Malloy realized he had been mistaken to believe his recent paper was accepted...
Doctors Earn CME Credit for Watching Medical Dramas
CHICAGO, IL - In a statement released earlier today, the Accreditation Council For Graduate Medical Education (ACGME) announced that doctors can earn continuing medical...
Breaking: Anti-Vaxxers Refusing Cooties Shot
ATLANTA, GA - Gomerblog has just learned that the anti-vaccination (or anti-vaxxer) movement has now pledged to refuse vaccination against the cooties, this on...
Genuine ‘Slipped and Fell’ Rectal Foreign Body Victim Stuns Experts
RICHMOND, VA - In what is thought to be a world's first, witnesses have confirmed that a young Virginian man genuinely slipped and fell...