Patient Continues to Insist He Suffers from “The Gouch,” Not Gout
NEW YORK, NY - Larry McCarthy is a 65-year-old gentleman who doesn’t believe in the classic food pyramid; he believes in meat and alcohol...
Study: Doc McStuffins More Evidence-Based Than Dr. Oz
ANAHEIM, CA - Public health researchers have published the results of a new study which sought to objectively measure the quality of medical advice given...
New Year’s Resolutions by Medical Specialty
Amazingly 2017 flew by in just over 360 days and now we find ourselves in 2018. Most of our energy will be focused on...
Obama Replaces Surgeon General with Nurse Practitioner General
WASHINGTON, D.C. - At a hastily-gathered press conference here today, President Obama announced that effective immediately, Surgeon General Rear Admiral (RADM) Boris D. Lushniak,...
Contact Precautions Stethoscope Will Be Replaced With Drawing of Stethoscope
CHARLESTON, SC - In an effort to cut down on cost and auscultation, hospitals are deciding to change to a illustrated picture of a...
Anesthesia Accepts Blame for Everything Wrong in Universe, Life As We Know It
SCHAUMBURG, IL - In breaking news just in to Gomerblog today, the American Society of Anesthesiologists (ASA) has formally announced it will finally accept blame for...
How to Eliminate Patient Handoffs: Work Straight Until Retirement, No Breaks
PITTSBURGH, PA - Hospital administrators at Pittsburgh Healthcare have developed an innovative approach to minimize handoffs and maximize continuity of care. The new Hire-Retire...
SHITSTORM Red Flag Phrases During Patient Turnover
DJIBOUTI, DJIBOUTI - The 5th annual Seminar of Hospital Internists Technologists Surgeons Traumatologists Others RNs and More (SHITSTORM) convention resulted in the drafting of...
Patient Admitted with Facebook Overdose
INDIANAPOLIS, IN - Alice Wilkinson was admitted last night after she was found down by her roommate, convulsing next to her smartphone. Her roommate,...