Surgery

ortho consults infectious disease

Orthopedics Consults Infectious Diseases for Potential Computer Virus

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - Dr. Joseph Dell of Orthopedic Surgery was hoping it would be a calm day; no surgeries were scheduled and his clinic schedule today was surprisingly light.  After two months of...

Hospital’s Electronic Health Record to Be Replaced by New, Efficient ‘Paper Chart’ System

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NEW YORK, NY – Citing slow load times, confusing menu structure, and overall frustration with the user interface, St. Barnaby’s Hospital has announced that the old electronic health record (EHR) will be replaced with a...

Obama Replaces Surgeon General with Nurse Practitioner General

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - At a hastily-gathered press conference here today, President Obama announced that effective immediately, Surgeon General Rear Admiral (RADM) Boris D. Lushniak, MD, MPH, would be replaced by a 15-year veteran surgical...
happy hour for health care workers

The Medical Professional Development Drinking Game

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All health professionals will have to participate in some sort of mandatory professional development from time to time.  Whether it’s an organization-wide initiative to "change the culture" or a departmental meeting to cover someone’s...
emergency department

Intern Shocked to Discover TV Residency and Real Residency Vastly Different

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BALTIMORE, MD - Dr. Anita Campbell dreamt of becoming a physician for years.  Three months ago, she finally graduated from medical school to fulfill her lifelong calling.  Growing up watching shows like Scrubs and...

Orthopedic Surgeon Finds Strange Sound with Stethoscope, Striker Rep Unable to Determine Source of...

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PITTSBURGH, PA – Dr. Harry Bonecutter, a prominent orthopedic surgeon at Pittsburgh Health, identified a strange noise emanating from a patient which he could not identify.  The incident occurred in his office during a...
orthopedic surgeon

Bones: An Orthopedic Surgeon’s Perspective

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By Orthopedic Surgeon, Dr. Thomas Partinger Bones.  I like bones.  I like big bones.  I like small bones.  I like bones.  I like long bones.  I like short bones.  I like old bones.  I like...
joint commission

Joint Commission is Coming: Hospital to Change Everything for Three Days Then Revert to...

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EVERY HOSPITAL, USA - Hospital administrators have finally cracked the secret to passing the highly-dreaded Joint Commission inspections.  For decades, the Joint Commission (JC) or previously called JACHO, but don't EVER call them that now...
pathology tumor board

Pathology Resident Makes Up Disease at Tumor Board, Groundbreaking Discovery

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CHICAGO, IL - A second-year pathology resident, Dr. Daniel Platt, is being credited with discovering a new tumor following a presentation at his hospital's tumor board.  "To be honest, I lost track of what I...