Surgery

On-Call Ophthalmologist Heroically Manages Eye Emergency from Bed

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DES MOINES, IA - Answering his phone in a daze at 2 AM last night, on-call ophthalmologist Reece Barnett reportedly handled a vision threatening...

Fortune Cookies Replace Lotto Numbers with Vital Signs

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BROOKLYN, NY - In an effort to appeal to health care professionals who order Chinese food for take out because the cafeteria is closed, fortune...

Guy on Motorcycle Looking Forward to Donating His Organs

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CALIFORNIA – Harris Jasper, a 3-year rider of a Kawasaki Ninja, or crotch rocket, told friends and family that this year would likely be the year...
types of beards

New Beard Policy Being Adopted at Many Hospitals in OR Clothing Algorithm

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Dear Hospital Employees, The following beard policy is being put into effect for your entire hospital.  This includes parking areas, food courts, and adjacent land.  We...
orthopedic surgery

Breaking News: Orthopedic Surgeon Completes 1000th Surgery with EBL of 50 cc

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NEW YORK, NY - GomerBlog is ecstatic to bring you breaking news out of OR 7 today at University Medical Center.  Dr. Stewart Shoemyer,...
asteroids hemorrhoids

The Difference Between Asteroids & Hemorrhoids

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In this series, Gomerblog helps health care professionals compare and contrast two entities that are often mistaken for one another.  Today we discuss the...
iv fluid

Voluven to Make Comeback as an Axillary Roll

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NEWCASTLE, AUSTRALIA - The end seemed nigh for Voluven.  The volume expander has been on the ropes after large clinical trials demonstrated increased risks...

Anesthesiologist Tired of Being Called ‘Anesthesia,’ Decides to Talk in 3rd Person with British...

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BOULDER, CO - Dr. Shelly Druben, a practicing anesthesiologist, is tired of being called "anesthesia" by her coworkers in the operating room. "All the nurses and operating...
phone

Health Care Providers Hail the Launch of the New “Patient Complaint Line”

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Following in the pattern of patient satisfaction scores, Dreamland General Hospital has initiated a new "Patient Complaint Line."  When a patient has acted in...
surgeon shoes

Patient Alarmed After Noticing Surgeon’s Shoelace Untied

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MARIETTA, GA - Multiple sources are confirming that local patient Harry Dander is growing increasingly concerned for his upcoming surgery after noticing that his...