Surgery

urine input

Yikes: Patient Reports 1.5 Liters of Urine Input

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Completely catching his inpatient team off guard, a hospitalized patient informed his urologist this morning not only had his urine...

Local Man Haunted by Crying Colic Baby

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ATLANTA, GA – Local resident Ryan Foster, a 28-year-old bachelor and physical medicine and rehabilitation (PMR) resident, told GomerBlog he was currently haunted by a...
santa claus stuck

Santa Claus In Serious Condition After Chimney Incident & Sleep Apnea Complications

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THE NORTH POLE - GomerBlog can confirm that Santa Claus is recovering, but remains in serious condition, at North Pole Community Hospital after an incident when...

Newly Promoted General Surgeon’s Business Cards, A Little Too True

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LOS ANGELES, CA – UCLA’s newly promoted general surgeon, Assistant Professor William Heffner, just received his updated business cards today.  An unfortunate error in...

Hospital for Special Surgery Admits to not Being “That Special”

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New York, NY- In an official announcement of something that has been known in ortho circles for quite some time, the Hospital for Special...

Curare Darts Phased Out Despite Drug Shortages

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MACON, GA - Like many medical centers, St. Joseph the Protector Hospital is experiencing severe drug shortages, especially in the operating room.  The latest unobtainable...
airplane

Pilot Makes Passengers NPO After Midnight for Flight Tomorrow

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ATLANTA, GA - In an effort to minimize the risk of aspiration during tomorrow's three-hour East coast flight from Atlanta's Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport to Boston's Logan...
atv craniotomy

NC Hospital Offers Discounted Craniotomy with ATV Purchase

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WINSTON-SALEM, NC - With hunting season fast approaching, a North Carolina hospital has made a controversial move: they have partnered with an ATV dealership...

Journal of Urology to be renamed “Balls”

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In a controversial move, the American Urological Association (AUA) has changed the name of their prestigious Journal of Urology to Balls. The unanticipated change...
butthurt anal resection

Breaking: Anal Resection Now First-Line Treatment for Butthurt

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CHICAGO, IL - In response to an exponential increase in cases of butthurt over the past several years, the American College of Surgeons (ACS)...