Da Vinci a Big Help on 14-Hour Flight
UNITED AIRLINES, MID-FLIGHT – Twenty minutes into Flight 156 from Los Angeles to Tokyo, a medical emergency took place. "Do we have a doctor...
Surgery is First Choice at Small Hospital
FRENCH GULCH, CA - Emergency Physicians and Orthopedic Surgeons at a small California hospital are excited about a new treatment modality for managing musculoskeletal...
General Surgery Realizes They’re Becoming the British Empire of Surgery
Local general surgeon, Arthur Wellesley, reclined in his leather armchair yearning for the days of General Surgery domination of nearly every aspect of Surgery. ...
NIH Close to Uncovering Elusive Fifth Abdominal Quadrant
BETHESDA, MD - Sensing a breakthrough is imminent, scientists at the National Institutes of Health (NIH) have publicly announced they are indeed very close...
Trauma Surgeon Struggles to Repair Hole in Favorite Pair of Pants
ATLANTA, GA - Trauma surgeon Maya Sonenstein has seen it all in her young career. “I’ve seen all kinds of trauma. My phone is...
Ophthalmologist Accidentally Agrees to See Inpatient Consult
Richard Thompson, a local ophthalmologist, was appalled to discover that he had accidentally agreed to see a patient currently admitted to local Mercy Hospital...
Fears Grow As Even More Doctors Die On Neverending Phone Hold
ATLANTA, GA - The CDC released chilling statistics demonstrating an epidemic of doctor deaths while on endless phone holds. "This is a disturbing trend,"...
Pioneering Bionics Company Gains FDA Approval for Robotic Penis
E-Rextion Bionix has proudly announced that its breakthrough HeteroErectus Cyberpenis enhancement prosthesis will soon be available to patients in the U.S. market who so...
Emergency: Navy Urologist Calls Out ‘All Hands on Dick!’
NORFOLK, VA - Realizing that this simple procedure was taking a turn for the worst and giving him more than he can handle, Navy urologist...
5.8 Million Packers Fans Sign Up to Donate Their Clavicles to Aaron Rodgers
GREEN BAY, WI - After Aaron Rodgers went down in Sunday's game against the Minnesota Vikings (0 Super Bowl trophies in team history), Packers (5...