Surgery

Psychic Hired to Read Patients’ Minds, Doctor Visit Time Reduced

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BATON ROUGE, LA -- Do you think doctors ask weird questions—like “Do you have any problems with your kidneys?” Or ones that are hard...

STAT Officially Means “Maybe”

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Ever wonder why your 8 AM stat blood draw hasn’t been done even though it’s now 7 PM the next day? ...
left hand

New Ortho Sub-Subspecialty Left Hand Fellowship Announced!

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COLLEGE PARK, MD - Fresh out of the ABMS office, it has been confirmed, Dr. Geaux Negolfing has applied and been approved to start...
medulla oblongata intramedullary nail IMN

Orthopod Places Intramedullary Nail Into Medulla Oblongata

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ANN ARBOR, MI - Expanding the possibilities of what can be done in the subspecialty of orthopedic surgery, orthopod Brock Hammersley has placed an...
obesity epidemic

Amidst Obesity Epidemic, Task Force Creates Glasgow Food Coma Scale

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ATLANTA, GA - In response to the public health crisis of food comas resulting from the ongoing obesity epidemic, the 3N Joint Task Force,...
ophthalmologist

Ophthalmologist Accidentally Agrees to See Inpatient Consult

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Richard Thompson, a local ophthalmologist, was appalled to discover that he had accidentally agreed to see a patient currently admitted to local Mercy Hospital...
surgeon shoes

Surgeon Recommends Amputation as Means of Improving Weight Loss Outcomes

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Los Angeles-based vascular surgeon Dr. Jackson Dyers has begun recommending that his patients living with obesity undergo above the knee...
upset mother

Mother Devastated to Learn Son’s Femur is Broken and Fractured

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WILLMAR, MN - Local mother, self-proclaimed Domestic Goddess, PTA President, and Essential Oils saleswoman Hilda Larson was absolutely crushed this past week when she...

Skeleton Started on IV Fluids, Was Bone Dry

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ST. LOUIS, MO - Dr. Shaw just admitted a difficult case at Washington University.  "I just admitted this bag of bones literally 2 hours...