Thousands Dead in Battle Between Ophthalmologists and Optometrists
WASHINGTON, DC - Thousands of eye care providers were found dead in the streets Monday morning after a vicious battle erupted between ophthalmologists and...
Study Shows More Studies Would Be Needed to Study Future Results
BETHESDA, MD – A recent article published in the New England Journal of Medicine discovered that more studies would be needed to study future results....
After Super Bowl, Health Care Practitioners Ready to Diurese the Sh*t Out of Everyone
WASHINGTON, D.C. - With the completion of Super Bowl XLIX so too ends the weekend of Super Bowl parties, celebrations, and unhealthy eating. It...
New Burger King and Hilton Hospital to Open
CHICAGO, IL - Burger King and Hilton have merged together and plan to finish construction shortly on a new state of the art hotel,...
White Doctors Removed From Endangered Species List After Successful Breeding In Captivity
WASHINGTON, DC - In a landmark move marking the resounding success of the Caucasian Physician Breeding In Captivity Program (CPBCP), the U.S. Fish & Wildlife Service...
Neurosurgeons Warn Battle of Wits Carries 20% Risk of Brain Herniation
ROLLING MEADOWS, IL - Engaging in a battle of wits is associated with, among other things, a 20% risk of brain herniation, this according...
Breaking News: Nurse’s Eyes Get Stuck After Aggressive Eye Roll
ORLANDO, FL - Beth Stanfield, a middle-aged nurse, was transported to the ophthalmology department earlier today when her eyes got stuck in an aggressive...
Surgeon General Consults Hospitalist General for Medical Management
WASHINGTON, DC - In breaking news, Gomerblog has received word today that the Surgeon General of the United States Vivek Murthy has consulted the...
Ortho Throws Vanc at Infected Total Knee, Misses and Breaks Window
YUCAIPA, CA - The Inland Empire of California has long been known as the Wild West of Medicine where board certified surgeons are as...
Tips: What Wine Pairs Well with Patients & Helps Me Cope with Them?
We’ve all been there. You’re at bedside with your patient and you find yourself stumped on which wine you should drink to best pair...