chest pain

Warriors Fans Suffering Chest Pain Radiating from Steph Curry’s Sprained Knee

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OAKLAND, CA - Sharpshooter Stephen Curry has officially suffered a sprained right MCL, which is so painful that it is in fact radiating to the...
ex fixed ex fix

Breaking News: Orthopod Places Ex Fix on Ex Fix

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SEATTLE, WA - Questioning if the external fixation device (or ex fix) placed on a patient’s leg is stable enough for the job, Harborview Medical...

Jesus Christ Himself Scheduled to Perform Miracle, Patient Furious with being NPO

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Mr. Jacobs’ primary team was thrilled when their hospital operator was finally able to get through to Jesus Christ regarding the miracle they were...
Mannequin Challenge

Code Team Performs Ill-Timed Mannequin Challenge During CPR

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JACKSONVILLE, FL - A code team at Jacksonville Medical Center (JMC) is under investigation after an ill-timed Mannequin Challenge during a cardiac arrest went...

Manhattan Clam Chowder Mistaken For Bloody Emesis

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New York, NY- In a case of understandable confusion, a bowl of uneaten Manhattan Clam Chowder was mistaken for bloody emesis at Columbia University...

Ode to Thyroid: Always the Bridesmaid, Never the Bride

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Listen I have to confess I have not been appreciative of you You give and you give and you give But you also know when to pull back You...

Fashion Police: Hospital Edition Weighs in on Fanny Packs

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In the most recent installment of Fashion Police: Hospital Edition, host Kathy Griffin along with commentators Giuliana Rancic, Kelly Osbourne, and special guest Jennifer...

RN, MD Confused After Patient Requests Pain Med That Begins with an E

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ATLANTA, GA - An inpatient health care team has been baffled all day by a patient’s persistent requests for pain medication, but it’s not...

CDC: Medical Noncompliance Actually Caused by Virus

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ATLANTA, GA - In breaking news, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has discovered a new virus that causes medical noncompliance, thereby...
peyton manning

Peyton Manning No Longer Has The Arm Strength to Deliver Papa John’s Pizzas

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DENVER, CO - According to Denver Broncos team doctors, aging 39-year-old quarterback Peyton Manning’s arm strength has significantly diminished to the point where he...