Surgery

Hospital’s Electronic Health Record to Be Replaced by New, Efficient ‘Paper Chart’ System

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NEW YORK, NY – Citing slow load times, confusing menu structure, and overall frustration with the user interface, St. Barnaby’s Hospital has announced that the...
pick picks picking brain brains

Neurosurgeons Warn Battle of Wits Carries 20% Risk of Brain Herniation

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ROLLING MEADOWS, IL - Engaging in a battle of wits is associated with, among other things, a 20% risk of brain herniation, this according...

Fourth-Year Medical School Rotations, Here’s the Gouge

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As third-year medical students begin to think about scheduling for next year, they must carefully consider how to arrange their final, and arguably most...

Game of Thrones Pain Scale

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Are you like me and tired of giving the same old boring explanation of the 0-10 pain scale?  Spice it up by using the...
davinci robot

Surgeon Uses da Vinci Robot to Craft the Perfect Ham and Cheese Sandwich

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CLEVELAND, OH - After finishing up his cases for the day, an oncological surgeon brought sandwich supplies with him to a vacant operating room...

CDC: Medical Noncompliance Actually Caused by Virus

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ATLANTA, GA - In breaking news, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has discovered a new virus that causes medical noncompliance, thereby...
eyeball exam

Internal Medicine Resident Performs IPPA on Eye Exam OSCE Station

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An internal medicine resident at the University of British Columbia in Vancouver, Canada provided some much-needed entertainment for a bored OSCE examiner during part...
PVC piping

Santa Gives Good Ortho Intern 1000 Feet of PVC Piping for Christmas

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - Boy, do we have a true feel-good story for you this Christmas.  Orthopedic intern, Bryce Bonebreaker, learned he did in fact...
airplane

Federal Aviation Administration’s Checklist-Oriented Outpatient Surgery Center Closes After Every Patient Dies

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WASHINGTON, DC - In what many practicing clinicians have called “not at all surprising” and “what dimwit funded this incredibly stupid idea?” the FAA has...
colonoscopy

Breaking: Gastroenterologist Thinks Patient is Full of Sh*t

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COOKEVILLE, TN - A local gastroenterologist by the name of Baxter Jones completely shocked patient Mason Watts and his family when he flat out...