Surgery

Ortho Throws Vanc at Infected Total Knee, Misses and Breaks Window

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YUCAIPA, CA - The Inland Empire of California has long been known as the Wild West of Medicine where board certified surgeons are as...
old man

Pioneering Bionics Company Gains FDA Approval for Robotic Penis

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E-Rextion Bionix has proudly announced that its breakthrough HeteroErectus Cyberpenis enhancement prosthesis will soon be available to patients in the U.S. market who so...

New Energy Drink, 25-Hour Energy, Marketed to Physicians, Allows Hospitals to Convert On-Call Rooms...

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WASHINGTON, DC - Controversial new energy drink, 25-Hour Energy, is fast becoming a staple in doctor’s lounges and cafeterias.  Available only to those with...

TSA Discovers Testicular Cancer on Local Man

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NEWARK, NJ – At the Newark Liberty Airport TSA agent Dennis Brown discovered a lump on a local man’s testicle. “I was just doing my...

Medical Specialties as Game of Thrones Characters

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As all medical specialties try to gain control of the hospital, we've narrowed down who their characters are: Cardiology, you poor tortured soul with a...
va hospital

Local Veterans Affairs Hospital to Merge with DMV

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to improve efficiency and patient satisfaction, a local Veteran's Affairs (VA) Hospital has announced it will merge with...
hospital patient

21 Tips for Patients on How to Be Good Patients: From Health Care Professionals

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Ok, it is time to be brutally honest to our patients.  As health care professionals, we want to take amazing care of them.  We...

Committee Investigates Surgeon Whose Shoes Are Always Untied

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BEND, OR - The credentials review committee at Our Lady of Hope Medical Center has started investigative proceedings against general surgeon Dr. David Wymer.  Wymer...
doctor on computer

Alternate Phrases for “This is a Very Pleasant…”

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It’s not uncommon to start a history of present illness (HPI), assessment, or discharge summary with the following phrase: This is a very pleasant…...
shoulder pain

A Cardiologist Explains: Shoulder Pain

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Hello, and good afternoon to you.  Of course, I know it must be the afternoon because I don't see patients in the morning or...