Surgery

Superman Kryptonite subclavian steal

Breaking: Man of Steel Has Subclavian Steal Syndrome

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METROPOLIS, US – Superman is back in the hospital at Metropolis Medical Center (MMC).  This time he presents with syncope and poor circulation in...
potato peeler

Op Note Reveals Surgery Performed Using Kitchen Utensils

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Surgeons, internists, and health care practitioners alike are stunned by a recent operative or op note left by podiatrist Tony...

Hospital’s Electronic Health Record to Be Replaced by New, Efficient ‘Paper Chart’ System

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NEW YORK, NY – Citing slow load times, confusing menu structure, and overall frustration with the user interface, St. Barnaby’s Hospital has announced that the...

Avagard Widely Replaced by Gym Chalk in Ortho Surgery Centers

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FREEHOLD, NJ - Avagard, the surgical hand antiseptic is now being replaced in many orthopedic surgery centers across the globe. The replacement? Large bowls...

Pain Detector Gives Actual Pain Score

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JERSEY CITY, NJ - A great new invention coined PAIN, short for Pain Acquiring Instrument Neat-O, is starting to be utilized in ERs across the...

Hospital Custodial Manager: ‘I Love Irritating the S**t Out of Them’

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CLEVELAND, OH - GomerBlog reporters are able to confirm that custodial staff at Memorial Hospital do indeed intentionally buff floors and clean bathrooms at...
second thoughts Da Vinci OB-GYN

Pregnant Mother Having Second Thoughts About Da Vinci as Her OB/GYN

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NEW YORK, NY - “It dawned on me as I had my legs apart and Da Vinci loomed over me with his intimidating red...
surgeon biopsy malignant fusion

Surgery Residents Bring Other MDs to Work for a Day

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5:00 am: Arrive at hospital. Peds and Psych are borderline comatose still. Medicine seems confused to find that the hospital lights work this early in...

Wuhan Virus Lab intern drank Coronavirus vials instead of Corona beer

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WUHAN, CHINA - Chinese officials just released footage that show a Wuhan Virus Lab intern pounding vial after vial of Coronavirus instead of his...
obese man

Breaking: 400-lb. Patient Not Actually Big-Boned

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AUBURN, AL – Albert “Big Al” McGriddle has been told all his life by his Mama that he wasn’t fat, he was just “big...