Guy on Motorcycle Looking Forward to Donating His Organs
CALIFORNIA – Harris Jasper, a 3-year rider of a Kawasaki Ninja, or crotch rocket, told friends and family that this year would likely be the year...
Lab Coats Now Available in Brand New Colors
MEMPHIS, TN - Like the stethoscope, the white lab coat has not only been a magnet for bodily fluids and random food products, but...
Near Death Experience for Medical Student After Taking Chart During Change of Shift
MILWAUKEE, WI - Richard Henning, a third-year medical student, has no idea how close he came to perishing at Memorial Hospital yesterday. At approximately 7:04 a.m.,...
Controversy Over Surgery Department’s ‘Most Annoying Medical Student’ Award
DALLAS, TX - Dr. Greg Peterson, a chief resident in general surgery, has seen his share of medical students rotate through the surgery service....
Elite Stryker Reps Ready to Ambush Next Orthopod Passerby
PORTLAND, ME - Tucked away in a Holiday Inn Express parking lot, a truck full of 75 elite special-ops Stryker reps dubbed the "Bone...
Medical Team Unable to Penetrate Patient’s Protective Blanket Cocoon
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - “I think it’s alive,” whispered intern Jason McCarren to nurse Mya Roberts, both at the patient’s bedside puzzled.
“Are you sure?”...
CDC Recommends Not Tying Gown in Back to Promote Airflow Through Ass Crack
ATLANTA, GA - After a thorough review of the evidence, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) will make the formal recommendation that...
Proposition 46 in California Designed by Inebriated Trial Lawyers, Sparks Proposition 47 and 48
SACRAMENTO, CA - A ferocious yearlong battle over Proposition 46 will be decided in California at the polls this upcoming November. Proposition 46 includes proposals...
Hospital Administrators to Evaluate Surgeon’s Potential for Revenue Versus Headache Generation
NASHVILLE, TN - Noted researchers Dr. Harvey Stephens and Dr. Phil Burman offer a new matrix for evaluating surgeons for employment. The STAR (Surgeon...
Struggling Intern Asking for ‘Just One Hug’
BOSTON, MA - "Just one hug" is all intern Philip Geary is asking, if not BEGGING, from his fellow interns, residents, students, nurses, attendings,...