Surgery

Diagnostic Criteria for a ‘Train Wreck’ Patient

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How does one identify a train wreck?  GomerBlog polled 1,000,000 health care providers in the last 48 hours and the general consensus is that,...

Poll Reveals Most Attending Surgeons Secretly Jealous About 80-Hour Work Week

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EGAN, ND - A poll of practicing surgeons at the recent Society of Magnificent Surgeons meeting revealed that 92% of those polled were secretly...
Turlaudidryl, BDT

Patients Love New Turkey Sandwich with Dilaudid & Benadryl: The Turlaudidryl Special

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - In a brilliant new campaign to improve patient satisfaction scores at the expense of appropriate medical care, hospital administrators and...

Virginia Designates Bovie Electrocautery as an Assault Scalpel, Subsequently Bans it

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Richmond, VA – In the brief time since the calendar turned to 2020, the Virginia House and Senate have passed several bills aimed at limiting...

The Updated Hippocratic Oath for Health Care Professionals

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I swear by Epic Hyperspace, by eCW, by Allscripts, by AthenaHealth, and by all the Coders and Accountants, making them my witnesses, that I...
brain stem biopsy

Physical Exam Tips: The Nervous System

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The physical exam of the brain and nervous system can be broken down into two parts: the lumbar puncture and everything else. Lumbar Puncture The lumbar...
fast train

Tips: How to Perform a Spinal Tap on a Moving Train

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I have to admit: spinal taps (lumbar punctures) are not one of my favorite procedures to perform.  I’m fairly certain our patients don’t enjoy...
brain surgery

Neurosurgeon Jokes “It’s Not Brain Surgery” for the First Time in History

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - In a combination of medical brilliance and creative genius, neurosurgeon Francesco Hernandez has spontaneously invented a joke that has just...
bouncy house

So You’re Paged While in a Bouncy House, What to Do Next

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There you are, jumping around happily in a bouncy house when the unthinkable happens: you get paged.  Well, maybe not unthinkable since you are...
MRI scanner claustrophobia

New General Electric MRI Scanner 20 Times Louder Than Ever

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SCHENECTADY, NY - General Electric (GE) plans to revolutionize the course of magnetic resonance (MR) history once more when later this month they introduce...