Brand New Vital Sign Added to Monitors and Electronic Medical Records
SAN DIEGO, CA – New governmental regulations passed last week by Congress have created another vital sign, making this the 6th core vital sign,...
‘Arrival’ Heroine, Dr. Louise Banks, Tries to Decipher Wordless Language of Orthopods
MONTANA - After playing a critical role in deciphering the language of the alien squid-like heptopods as chronicled in last year's real-life documentary Arrival,...
Stricter Operating Room Attire Policy Now Calls for Decapitation
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - After extensive evidence-based research, recent updates to the hospital policy for OR hats and attire were released at the staff...
Controversy Over Surgery Department’s ‘Most Annoying Medical Student’ Award
DALLAS, TX - Dr. Greg Peterson, a chief resident in general surgery, has seen his share of medical students rotate through the surgery service....
Nadal Calls Medical Timeout After Limbs Fall Off During Epic Rally
FLUSHING, NY - No. 1 seed Rafael Nadal cruised to victory in his opening match against Dujan Lajovic despite calling a brief medical timeout...
Orthopod Writes a Longer Note Than Hospitalist: Metaphysical Calamity Ensues
KEARNEY, NE - Fatefully cleaving the time line in two, an orthopedic surgeon at Kind Humanitarian Hospital (KHH) wrote a progress note longer than...
Unable to Fix Office Thermostat, Neurosurgeon Removes Own Hypothalamus
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Talk to any health care professional and they'll tell you that self-treatment is not the best idea. However, for one...
Soap Opera Doctor Still Awaiting Credentialing 5 Years and Counting
HOLLYWOOD, CA – Dr. Mario Love, a well-known Days of Our Lives general surgeon, is still not credentialed at his local hospital after being on the...
Developmental Milestones for a Baby Orthopod
As a proud new parent, you may be distracted by everything it takes to be successful. However, if you pay enough attention to your...
Breaking News: Orthopod Catches Dosing Error
BOSTON, MA - Rotating Orthopedics 4th year resident, Dr. Brandt Sullivan, caught a medication error at Boston Children’s Hospital two nights ago. Dr. Sullivan...