A Cardiologist Explains: Shoulder Pain
Hello, and good afternoon to you. Of course, I know it must be the afternoon because I don't see patients in the morning or...
Intern Asks Nurse for Multiple Choices Before Making Decision
On his first week as a surgery intern, Dane Colbert began what is sure to be a storied career in medicine by asking the nurse...
Nation’s Arteries Brace for Impact of Chipotle’s New Queso
SACRAMENTO, CA – Speaking at a press conference last Saturday, a local left renal artery expressed “grave concern” amongst itself and the billions of...
‘Drama Surgery’ Officially Listed as New Specialty by ACGME
This fall, fourth-year medical students everywhere are able to apply to a ‘woke’ new specialty: Drama Surgery.
“Due to the increasing number of millennials interested...
Ortho Writes Perfect SOAP Note, First No-Worder This Year
LOS ANGELES, CA - Cliff Kershaw of UCLA Medical Center etched his way into the record books early this morning as he wrote the...
Three-Sentence Discharge Summary For Six-Month Hospitalization
ROME, GA - Doctors and hospital administrators are lauding what has been called a "breakthrough in succinctness," as a patient discharged after six months in...
Avagard Widely Replaced by Gym Chalk in Ortho Surgery Centers
FREEHOLD, NJ - Avagard, the surgical hand antiseptic is now being replaced in many orthopedic surgery centers across the globe. The replacement? Large bowls...
FDA Approves 55-Hour ENERGY for Incoming July Interns
WASHINGTON, DC - In a major win for soon-to-be-exhausted incoming July interns at residency programs across the land, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has...
Map My Couch App Released in Response to Map My Run App
In response to the numerous Map My Run and other workout posts that inundate newsfeeds on Facebook, a psychology group out of Houston TX...
Anesthesiologist Proposes Use of Metric Time
HOUSTON, TX - Dr. Alan Payne, an anesthesiologist and physicist, proposes the use of metric time for determining surgical time duration.
“How many times at...