Surgery

Tom Price

Breaking: Tom Price Signs Off, Turfs Department of Health & Human Services to Medicine

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - After dealing with scandal over the use of private jets for multiple government business trips, orthopedic surgeon Tom Price has signed...
surgery resident

Signs You May Be a Surgery Resident

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If you have ever thanked God for the presence of a CRNA student and their multiple A-line attempts because it gave you time to...
emotional scar collagen

Pathologists Find Emotional Scars Also Made of Collagen

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CHICAGO, IL - A fascinating new report from the American Society for Clinical Pathology (ASCP) explains emotional scars are actually made up of the...
physician on toilet paper coffee sit-to-sh*t 29 seconds

Gastroenterologist Paged Record 35 Times While in Restroom

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KANSAS CITY, MO - In a stark development it has been reported that earlier this morning during a five-minute bathroom break, Dr. Timothy McFadden, a...

Anesthesiologist Tired of Being Called ‘Anesthesia,’ Decides to Talk in 3rd Person with British...

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BOULDER, CO - Dr. Shelly Druben, a practicing anesthesiologist, is tired of being called "anesthesia" by her coworkers in the operating room. "All the nurses and operating...
ehr

EHR team regrets letting clinicians vote on project name as BONER upgrade goes live

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Multiple Electronic Health Systems consultants expressed regret Monday over a poorly conceived plan to allow clinicians to vote on their system's project name as...
angry patient

Poor Colonoscopy Bowel Prep Blamed on Doctor

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BOUTTE, LA - Bobby Boudreaux's colonoscopy had to be aborted this morning due to a poor bowel prep, making it impossible to safely perform...
printer

ACGME to Drop Boards Testing in Favor of NFL-esque Skills Combine

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WASHINGTON, DC - The ACGME made a ground-breaking decision last week to stop their decades long practice of medical boards testing.  Instead, all 4th-year medical students...
camera crew for inspections

NFL Grants Seahawks’ Team Physician Access to Randomly Check Brady’s Balls

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NEW YORK, NY - NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell announced yesterday his plan to address the New England Patriots’ latest veiled attempt to bend league rules to...