Hospital Taking Patient Satisfaction Scores Way Too Seriously
CHICAGO, IL - "Simply outrageous," were comments expressed by physicians and nurses in regards to how hospital administrators were implementing new management policies at Mercy...
Unfortunate Plastic Surgery Leaves Man Nearly Identical To Nicholas Cage
SALEM, OR - The title tells the tale. Oregonian Nate Carthage is now nearly identical to Nicolas Cage after an unfortunate plastic surgery mishap....
Medicine Consulted by Orthopedics on Medicine Patient
OMAHA, NE - Earlier today on an inpatient medical/surgical floor at Nebraska Medical Center, a confusing series of events in the care of hospitalized...
Orthopedic Surgeons Find Revolutionary Auscultation Point
OMAHA, NE - Orthopedic surgeons of the University of Nebraska, Medical Center (UNMC) have found a new auscultation point that combines all cardiac, respiratory, and...
ENT Cannot Bear to Watch as Man Picking Nose Tempts Fate
ATLANTA, GA - Sure, otolaryngologist Eric Osawa was trying to enjoy his day off today, but has now found himself at a coffee shop looking...
Obama Replaces Surgeon General with Nurse Practitioner General
WASHINGTON, D.C. - At a hastily-gathered press conference here today, President Obama announced that effective immediately, Surgeon General Rear Admiral (RADM) Boris D. Lushniak,...
Boring PowerPoints New Leading Cause of Death Among Health Care Practitioners
ATLANTA, GA - A new study published in the latest issue of the Journal of Small Font & Uninteresting Topics (JSFUT) revealed that sinfully...
The Epic EHR Bartender
Patron: I’d like a beer.
Epic: Wait until I log on… (30 seconds) Welcome to Hyperspace!
Patron: I’d like a beer.
Epic: Pick from this list.
Patron: Hmm…...
A Revolutionary New Objective Pain Scale Could Replace the 0-10 Pain Scale
The conventional 0-10 pain scale used as “the fifth vital sign” has made caregivers complacent in pain management. A new scale has been devolved...