Medicine Consulted for History and Physical
IOWA CITY, IA - The University of Iowa Orthopedic Department has gone "all-in." At 13:36 on Thursday, Orthopedic Surgery finally took the plunge from the...
U.S. Women’s Relay Team Elects to Use Femur, Not Baton for Handoffs
RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - For this week's upcoming track and field event, the USA Track & Field Women's 4x100m Team has announced that it has...
Podiatrists Admit They’re Not Really Examining Patients, Just Tickling Them
TOEJAM LAKE, CA - At the 23rd annual National Podiatric Conference on Bunions, the board of directors voted 5-4 to admit what the public...
Breaking: Tom Price Signs Off, Turfs Department of Health & Human Services to Medicine
WASHINGTON, D.C. - After dealing with scandal over the use of private jets for multiple government business trips, orthopedic surgeon Tom Price has signed...
PT and OT File for Divorce
PITTSBURGH, PA - In news that is making banner headlines in society pages nationwide and has left medical high society shocked and incredulous, Physical...
Rectal Exam Nuisance: New Product Changing the Way We Look at Cheeks
MIAMI, FL - A new product by Telameto Corporation has emergency practitioners cheering for joy. The inefficiencies of the rectal exam will quickly be...
Five-Second Rule Validated in the Operating Room
CHICAGO, IL - In a paradigm shift for the operating room, a new study has found that reusing instruments dropped on the operating room...
Psychic Hired to Read Patients’ Minds, Doctor Visit Time Reduced
BATON ROUGE, LA -- Do you think doctors ask weird questions—like “Do you have any problems with your kidneys?” Or ones that are hard...
HIPAA Loosens Up, Just Say Whatever, Whenever, Wherever the Hell You Want
WASHINGTON, DC - Doctors, nurses, and other health care practitioners nationwide are breathing a sigh of relief this morning as government officials have loosened...
Virginia Designates Bovie Electrocautery as an Assault Scalpel, Subsequently Bans it
Richmond, VA – In the brief time since the calendar turned to 2020, the Virginia House and Senate have passed several bills aimed at limiting...