Surgeon Performs In-Utero Tommy John Surgery
KANSAS CITY – A surgeon in Kansas City reports he has performed the world’s first in-utero Tommy John surgery. A hospital spokesperson states that the...
Medical Researcher Belatedly Realizes His Paper Was Published in The Anals of Internal Medicine
DES MOINES, IA – With dawning horror, local medical researcher Dr. Clint Malloy realized he had been mistaken to believe his recent paper was accepted...
Orthopaedics to Begin to Use Emojis in Progress Notes
CHICAGO, IL - In a progressive move by the National Orthopaedic Society of Orthopaedic Surgeons and Orthopaedists (NOSOSO), emojis have now been approved to...
Ophthalmologists Found to be “Physically Weakest” of All Specialists
New research has shed light on which group of physicians are the most physically frail and feeble. Emerging data shows that the top spot...
Man Gives Frozen Nintendo Cartridge 2 Rescue Breaths
LOS ANGELES, CA - In a desperate attempt to salvage his copy of Super Mario Bros, L.A. native and first-year University of California at Los...
Do You Know Your ABCs by Subspecialty?
CHICAGO, IL – The American College of Surgeons (ACS) released new subspecialty-focused primary survey guidelines for Advanced Trauma Life Support (ATLS) this week after...
Trauma Surgeon Looks Forward to Sleeping in Until 5 AM Tomorrow
SEATTLE, WA - After what has been undoubtedly a very busy week even for what is expected this time of year, Harborview Medical Center trauma...
Headlines from the Week in Medical News
ROCHESTER, NY - After two-year grant-writing process, associate professor of medicine’s submission to JAMA’s “funny cartoon caption contest” fails peer review process.
AKRON, OH -...
Video Gamer Unlocks Da Vinci on Original Mortal Kombat
Nearly 25 years after its creation, professional video gamer Prasanth Malhotra has unearthed a never-before-seen character in the original Mortal Kombat: the Da Vinci surgical robot....
Fake News: Tiger Wasn’t Pulled Over for DUI, He Was Post-Call
PALM BEACH, FL - Reports have surfaced that CNN's original claim that Tiger Woods was arrested for driving under the influence are false. It...