Orthopedics Consults Infectious Diseases for Potential Computer Virus
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Dr. Joseph Dell of Orthopedic Surgery was hoping it would be a calm day; no surgeries were scheduled and his...
General Surgeon Moves Clinic to Operating Room, Cites Excessive Patient Consciousness
CEDAR RAPIDS, IA – Jacob Townsend, a 53-year-old general surgeon, has decided to permanently move his clinic to the operating room due to ongoing...
Texting While Operating Now Illegal in 5 states
SACRAMENTO, CA – On Monday California became the 5th state to ban texting while operating. This new legislation came after Dr. Kenneth Fellet texted...
Cardboard Cutout of Medical Student Receives Honors in Surgery
General Surgery is widely considered to be one of the most difficulty rotations in medical school. Many medical students strive to earn the coveted...
Tips: How to Worsen Your Already-Terrible Bedside Manner
You may find your bedside manner is pretty terrible given how busy you are and your general frustration with humanity as a whole. If...
Homeopathic Burn Remedy Effective, Allopaths Stunned
DENVER, CO - Doctors, skeptics, and the scientific community as a whole, were stunned today when the North American branch of the Society for...
New Sub-Zero ORs Trialed: Orthopedic Surgeon Still Asking for Temperature Turned Down
CHICAGO, IL - In an effort to remove excess body heat that orthopedic surgeons generate, OR manufacturer Slyker has paired with refrigerator maker Frigid-Air...
Average American Healthcare Consumer Believes Death is Curable
ATLANTA, GA - According to a new study published in the Annals of External Medicine (AEM), it is reported that the average American health...
American Red Cross Creates American Brown Cross for Fecal Transplant Donations
WASHINGTON, DC - Despite increasing clinician awareness and education as well as instituting universal gloving procedures, hospital-associated Clostridium difficile infections have continued to be...
Hospital Merges with Fast Food, Tobacco Companies to ‘Stay Competitive’
CHICAGO, IL - As you pass by the ER entrance at Cook County Hospital, the unmistakable aroma of grease, processed burgers, and cigarette smoke...