Surgery

New Energy Drink, 25-Hour Energy, Marketed to Physicians, Allows Hospitals to Convert On-Call Rooms...

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WASHINGTON, DC - Controversial new energy drink, 25-Hour Energy, is fast becoming a staple in doctor’s lounges and cafeterias.  Available only to those with...
defibrillator

ICU Team Develops Defibrillator With New Setting: The Slow Code Mode

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PHOENIX, AZ - Luck of the Lady Hospital in Arizona has begun to trial a defibrillator developed by a few of its seasoned staff,...
chloraprep

Donald Trump’s Orange Complexion Due To ChloraPrep From Last Plastic Surgery

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WASHINGTON, D.C - The U.S. Surgeon General accidentally revealed in a recent interview that President Trump’s skin tone is actually a normal shade of...
medical pager

Tips: How to Treat a Pager That Keeps Going Off Like It Has Seizures

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Sadly, despite all the technological advances we've made, a good portion of health care professionals still carry an object as archaic and arguably less...
orthopedic surgery kid

Breaking: Ummm Yeah, Fifty Bucks Says This Kid’s Going into Ortho

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MIAMI, FL - Without waiting to see how his prepubescent, teenage, or even college years pan out, Gomerblog is already going to call it: fifty...
ortho consults infectious disease

Orthopedics Consults Infectious Diseases for Potential Computer Virus

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - Dr. Joseph Dell of Orthopedic Surgery was hoping it would be a calm day; no surgeries were scheduled and his...
Steve Bannon

Surgical Oncologist Successfully Resects Steve Bannon from National Security Council

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - At a press conference at MedStar Georgetown University Hospital early this morning, surgical oncologist Dr. H.R. McMaster was pleased to announce that he...
new medical app

Anesthesiologist Proposes Use of Metric Time

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HOUSTON, TX - Dr. Alan Payne, an anesthesiologist and physicist, proposes the use of metric time for determining surgical time duration. “How many times at...

New Ophthalmology Intern Not Sure How to Spell Ophthalmology

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IOWA CITY, IA - It was a rough start to the year for first-year ophthalmology resident Tony Beamer, who was recently caught trying to spell "ophthalmology," the name of...
left hand

New Ortho Sub-Subspecialty Left Hand Fellowship Announced!

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COLLEGE PARK, MD - Fresh out of the ABMS office, it has been confirmed, Dr. Geaux Negolfing has applied and been approved to start...