Surgery

chloride

Breaking: Nurse Initiates Lesser-Known Chloride Repletion Protocol

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - Nurse Jess Casamento of Ochsner Medical Center is one of the best when it comes to repleting electrolytes: potassium, magnesium, even...

RN, MD Confused After Patient Requests Pain Med That Begins with an E

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ATLANTA, GA - An inpatient health care team has been baffled all day by a patient’s persistent requests for pain medication, but it’s not...
iv pca infusion pump WiFi

Study: Doctors Can’t Operate an IV Infusion Pump Even If Life Depended On It

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BALDWIN, NY - A new study in the New England Journal of Alaris (NEJA) confirmed something we knew all along: doctors can't operate an IV...

Charmin Profits As July Interns Sh*t Themselves

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GREEN BAY, WI - Proctor & Gamble's toilet paper brand Charmin expects to see profits soar throughout July as new interns flood hospitals in a blazing...
genital exam, Halloween

GU’s Halloweiner Special: Wear Costume, Free Genital Exam

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LINTHICUM, MD - The American Urological Association (AUA) is promoting men's health this October 31st by offering a one-day Halloweiner special: visit your urologist...
orthopedic surgeon ortho spelling bee WBAT sticks & stones

Breaking: Winning Word at Ortho Spelling Bee is “WBAT”

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TIBIAL PLAINS, PA - Defeating over 300 of the country’s best-spelling orthopods, Jimmy “Jackhammer” Jameson has claimed the coveted title of American Ortho Spelling Bee...
spay neuter frightened favorite pen

Laparoscopic Training Box Septic After Practice Session with Interns

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An inanimate training apparatus, made up of a plastic box with holes to place a laparoscopic camera and graspers, is in critical condition after...
anesthesiologist billing trachea esophagus

Jealous of Surgeons’ Da Vinci, Anesthesia Demands Robot of Their Own

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KEARNEY, NE - Growing increasingly dissatisfied with the benefits of a automaton and robotics enjoyed by their colleagues on the other side of the...
Brie Hammersley complete blood loss

Women to be recruited into ortho with promise of no line for bathroom

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The American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons has begun a new campaign to entice women to enter a career in orthopaedic surgery. Dr. David Bonaparte,...

An Orthopaedic Surgeon Explains Renal Tubular Acidosis

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GLOBOGYM HEADQUARTERS, MA - Apparently someone at GomerBlog Twitter headquarters thought it would be funny to make me explain a “real” medical topic to...