Headlines from the Week in Medical News
ROCHESTER, NY - After two-year grant-writing process, associate professor of medicine’s submission to JAMA’s “funny cartoon caption contest” fails peer review process.
AKRON, OH -...
Unprepared Patient Cramming for Tomorrow’s Rectal Exam
AUBURN, AL - Forever the procrastinator, nervous and unprepared patient Johnny Sanders has started cramming for tomorrow's rectal exam in the hopes he can...
Orthopedic Surgeon Uses da Vinci Robot, Voids the Warranty
FLORENCE, ID – The OR staff here at Idaho Regional Medical Center is buzzing with the news that the hospital’s only da Vinci robot...
Kentucky Derby Will Include a Hospital Specialty ‘Race for the Roses’ at Churchill Downs
LOUISVILLE, KY - With the Kentucky Derby just around the corner, excitement is mounting for all the festivities and races. Many of the races...
Surgeon Summons the Dark Lord Xepneumotep to Scrub In
CHANCELOR, NC - Dr. Mathers, a surgical oncologist, decided to take on a pancreatic cancer patient whose cancer had engulfed a large portion of the liver....
Doctor Wins Lottery: Patient List Free of Jerks, A**holes
NEW YORK, NY - Internal medicine physician Damien Sharp won the medical equivalent of a lottery jackpot today: his patient list is completely devoid...
Neurosurgeon Jokes “It’s Not Brain Surgery” for the First Time in History
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - In a combination of medical brilliance and creative genius, neurosurgeon Francesco Hernandez has spontaneously invented a joke that has just...
Neck Fusion Gone Awry: Carried Away, Neurosurgeon Fuses All 206 Bones
NASHVILLE, TN - Admitting enthusiasm got the best of her, Vanderbilt neurosurgeon Dr. Elle Hardwire got carried away with an anterior cervical discectomy and...
Say It Isn’t So: OB Dumps GYN, Now Dating ENT
NEW ORLEANS, LA - First PT/OT, then Brangelina, now this?! After centuries together as one of healthcare's power couples, Gomerblog reports that OB/GYN is...
Breaking News: Orthopod Catches Dosing Error
BOSTON, MA - Rotating Orthopedics 4th year resident, Dr. Brandt Sullivan, caught a medication error at Boston Children’s Hospital two nights ago. Dr. Sullivan...