Ugly Med Student Trying to Match into Plastic Surgery Not Expected To Do Well
SEATTLE, WA - Three months ago, fourth year medical student Trevor Barlock took a deep breath and submitted his applications to integrated plastic surgery...
So You Dropped Your Pager into the Toilet, What to Do Next
You're on-call, but before sh*t hits the fan, you hit the toilet. Just when you're pulling up your pants or fixing your belt, you...
Do You Know Your ABCs by Subspecialty?
CHICAGO, IL – The American College of Surgeons (ACS) released new subspecialty-focused primary survey guidelines for Advanced Trauma Life Support (ATLS) this week after...
Anesthetists Go on Strike, Local Hospital Thrown into Turmoil
BOSTON, MA - Chaos ensued in a local hospital early yesterday morning when the whole Anesthesiology department went on a "no-show strike."
"We were prepping...
Spine Surgeon Pleads for Children to Stop Stepping On Sidewalk Cracks
INTERCOURSE, PA – Many things have been lost in the current generation to include basic social skills, manners, and the ability to poop without...
General Surgeon Addicted to Thrill of Craigslist Bargaining
BOISE, ID - Many physicians complain about burnout and lack of inspiration during routine procedures but one doctor has found his own solution. “After...
Surgical Oncologist Successfully Resects Steve Bannon from National Security Council
WASHINGTON, D.C. - At a press conference at MedStar Georgetown University Hospital early this morning, surgical oncologist Dr. H.R. McMaster was pleased to announce that he...
Eco-Unfriendly Plastic Urinary Catheters Banned, Replaced by Paper Ones
SEATTLE, WA—Following the successful mission to replace hazardous plastic straws with paper ones, environmentalists are now targeting plastic urinary catheters, hoping to swap them
out...
Medical Student Paged ‘Stat’ for Fecal Disimpaction Case
PHOENIX, AZ - At 2:30 a.m., medical student Amanda Williamson was abruptly woken from her deep sleep to a STAT page. "At first I didn't...
These Two Dudes Caught, Reign of Terror Over
ST. LOUIS, MO – America’s most popular unsolved mystery, the mystery case of two individuals who team up to shoot, beat, and steal from many...