Surgery

New Hospital Beds Harder to Figure Out Than Acid-Base

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NASHVILLE, TN - Medical staff at Nashville Memorial Hospital are completely baffled by a new fleet of hospital beds on Unit 55-G, saying that...
ophthalmology

Ophthalmologists Report Hindsight More Like 20/80

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA – Top ophthalmologists announced this week that hindsight, long thought to be 20/20, is actually much closer to 20/80.  “This is...
vp shunt

Stephen Hawking Develops VP Shunt Law

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UNIVERSITY OF CAMBRIDGE, ENGLAND - Brilliant theoretical physicist and cosmologist Stephen Hawking has stunned the scientific community once again. After years of researching the...
sleeping in

Trauma Surgeon Looks Forward to Sleeping in Until 5 AM Tomorrow

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SEATTLE, WA - After what has been undoubtedly a very busy week even for what is expected this time of year, Harborview Medical Center trauma...

Endangered VA System Named 60th U.S. National Park

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to preserve one of the United States' most endangered areas for future generations, President Obama signed a law...

Hospital Enacts New BYOD Policy: Bring Your Own Dilaudid

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NEW YORK, NY - With patients treating hospitals like an a la carte restaurant or 5-star luxury hotel, hospital leaders at New York Medical...

Orthopedic Surgeon Creates a Cyborg by Mistake After Replacing Every Joint in the Body

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“It wasn’t till my 80-year-old patient told me, 'Hasta la vista, baby,' that I realized that she has been turned into a T-810 by...
orthopedic surgeon ortho spelling bee WBAT sticks & stones

BREAKING: Ortho resident performs first uterine open reduction internal fixation

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PHILADELPHIA, PA: Orthopedic surgery resident Rob Abington was recently recognized by the American Academy of Orthopedic Surgeons for performing the first open reduction with...

Standardized Patient Suing Medical School After No One Detected Prostate Cancer

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TAMPA BAY, FL - 56-year-old Michael Finnerly has been volunteering his services to the local medical school's standardized patient program for several years.  Last week he was...
daughter to hospital day

Hospital’s ‘Take Your Daughter to Work’ Day Not Such a Good Idea

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ST. LOUIS, MO - Hepatobiliary surgeon Dr. Jeanne Devereux was disappointed.  "How hard could it be?!" she fumed.  "Just hold the damn retractor and...