Conversation Starters While Scrubbing For Surgery with Your Attending
Scrubbing before surgery can be an awkward time for residents who have to spend up to 5 uninterrupted minutes standing next to an attending...
Yikes: Patient Reports 1.5 Liters of Urine Input
LOS ANGELES, CA - Completely catching his inpatient team off guard, a hospitalized patient informed his urologist this morning not only had his urine...
American College of Surgeons to Publish New “Because I Said So” or BISS-Based Medicine...
WASHINGTON, DC - A press release today from the American College of Surgeons stated, “After years of putting up with the satanic nonsense known...
20 Out of 10 Medical Providers Annoyed by Patients’ Misuse of Pain Scales
ATLANTA, GA - According to a new study by the Centers for Pain Control & Other Nonsense (CPCON), a whopping 20 out of 10...
ED Consults Vascular Surgery for “Pulseless Foot” on a Pulseless Human
Saint Louis, MO - Mr. James Rice originally presented to the John L. McClellan Memorial Veterans Hospital in Saint Louis with shortness of breath...
Proctologists Have Record 2015, as Many Were Butthurt on the Internet
The National Association of Proctologists (NAP) reported record profits for proctologists in 2015 as an unprecedented number of people were butthurt from internet-related postings....
A Cardiologist Explains: Shoulder Pain
Hello, and good afternoon to you. Of course, I know it must be the afternoon because I don't see patients in the morning or...
Recto-Retriever Approved for Personal Use
COLUMBIA, SC - Proctologic Inc. announces the release of its new product, the Recto-Retriever. The Recto-Retriever is an amazing, thrilling, and versatile tool that...
Anesthesia Resident Finishes Reading Entire Internet During Free Flap Surgery
NEW YORK, NY – John Silk, a fourth-year anesthesiology resident at State Medical Hospital in New York, will now have his name immortalized in...
Surgeon Performs Appendectomy, Still Trying to Convince OR Staff That It Was Infected
KNOXVILLE, TN – General surgeon Dr. Hendrick Knightsville is being credited with quite an acting performance in operating room 7. Dr. Knightsville took a...