Generous Administrators Upgrade Medicine Conference Room Table with Large Plywood Spool
ALBANY, NY - In a show of boundless generosity, the hospital administration has donated a large plywood spool to the internal medicine work room to...
Bitcoin Users Infected with Cryptocurrency Meningitis
ATLANTA, GA - Over the past month, volatile swings in bitcoin have led to an ominous halving of its value, which has thrown investors...
Hospitalist Becomes Own Endless Loop
In a stunning procession of events, nocturnist Angus "Kilty" McSwagger became the only known hospitalist to experience the so-called "admission mirror paradox." Long speculated...
Hospitals Now Offering Seasonal Pumpkin-Spiced Patient Satisfaction Surveys
BOCA RATON, FL - Hospital administrators at Madre De Díos Medical Center will now offer seasonal pumpkin-spiced patient satisfaction surveys in order to improve...
Spa Offers ‘Ultimate Relaxation’ With 55-Minute Carotid Sinus Massage
SANTA FE, MN - For guests who want to experience the ultimate in relaxation, the spa at the Inn of the Four Extremities is...
Unchartered Territory: Doctor Makes Patient NPO After Discharge
DURHAM, NC - Stating that the outside world contains enough variables to make pulmonary aspiration a true and serious risk, hospitalist Mack Reynolds has...
What, No Dilaudid?! Guests Leave Super Bowl Party AMA
ATLANTA, GA - Stating that the party spread of salads, sandwiches, guacamole, cheese and pepperoni pizza, wings, burgers, hot dogs, and fried chicken simply...
ICD-10 Primer, Lesson 1: Macaw Documentation
October 1, 2015 marks the transition to ICD-10, a diagnostic system with a level of detail so specific that no one cares. ICD-10’s greatest...
Acute GI Bleed ER Patient Admitted to ICU with One 22g IV Dangling in...
CLEVELAND, OH – Initial news feeds are reporting that an acute GI bleed patient is being transferred up from the ER to the ICU...
U.S. on COVID-19: “Help Me, Obi-Wan Kenobi, You’re My Only Hope”
TATOOINE - While cleaning his new R2-D2 droid after purchasing them from the Jawas, Luke Skywalker accidentally triggered a holographic recording of a desperate...