Heavy Metal Now First Line in Treatment of Symptomatic Bradycardia
DALLAS, TX - New advanced cardiac life support (ACLS) guidelines from the American Heart Association (AHA) now recommends heavy metal as the first line...
Breaking: Consultant Called for Non-Urgent Consult at Reasonable Hour
NASHVILLE, TN - First-year infectious diseases fellow Lena Burke burst into tears of joy when in the rarest of occurrences - certainly the first...
FDA Reminder: Baby Aspirin Not Actually Meant for Babies
SILVER SPRING, MD - Looking to clear things up to the confused American public, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has issued a reminder that...
Patient Can’t Pronounce Metoprolol, Electively Intubated
RICHMOND, VA - Patient Mary Andrews, a 52-year-old female with atrial fibrillation tried to pronounce the beta blocker “metoprolol” earlier this morning. She found...
Doctor Trapped In Time Vortex Re-Explaining Medical Care to Multiple Family Members
BOCA RATON, FL - Dr. Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram has been trapped in an apparent healthcare time vortex as he continues to be forced to re-explain medical care...
Shhh, Doctor Physically Tucking In Patients Before Heading Home
PROVIDENCE, RI - It's not uncommon for inpatient health care professionals to say they're going to "tuck in their patients" before shift change or...
New CDC Recommendation: Ignore Patients with Pain > 4
ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has issued a new recommendation on the heels of March's "CDC Guideline for...
Interventional Radiology To Only Do Procedures if INR < 0
OAK BROOK, IL - In an effort to completely eliminate the risk of bleeding, newly-issued guidelines from the Radiological Society of North America (RSNA)...
NASA Plans to Build a Skilled Nursing Facility on Mars
MERRITT ISLAND, FL - Scientists have been planning a human mission to Mars for exploration and habitation for decades. Successful travel to and habitation of...
That Can’t Be Good: Flu Swab Positive for C. Diff
ATLANTA, GA - In a highly-ominous sign suggesting this year's influenza season may be as bad or even worse than last year's, the Centers...