Part-Time Medical Professional at Hospital with No COVID-19 Cases Lines Up Selfie in Full...
Times are tough for those in healthcare: the novel SARS CoV-2, personal protective equipment shortages, national runs on inhalers and hydroxychloroquine, public health leadership...
CDC Recommends Against HIV, Infections in General
ATLANTA, GA - In a statement earlier today, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has recommended against the human immunodeficiency virus (or...
Local Organic Mom Pleased to Have All Natural, Antibiotic-Susceptibility-Free Infection
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Local organic mom, Fern Meadow, is pleased that her life-threatening leg infection is pandrug-resistant.
“When I spiked a fever and saw red...
Scented Packing Gauze Makes Abscesses Fresh and Fun
PROVIDENCE, RI - The field of wound care is taking note of a new line of whimsically-scented wound packing products pioneered by Quintac Hospital. ...
The Joint Commission Unveils New Mandatory Hand Hygiene Checklist
In an earnest effort to remove barriers to hand hygiene and improve the abysmal national hand hygiene rate of 5%, TJC just released a...
Yawning: America’s New Epidemic
YAHNSBERG, YAWNSIN - The first case of yawning was reported in 622 BC by Cepheyawneas. Historians may continue to debate if this case was Patient Zero, but...
Not Quite: Intern Claims Champagne Tap After Sticking Bottle of Moët & Chandon
BOSTON, MA - An intern’s initial excitement was quickly reeled in after his team pointed out that sticking a spinal needle through cork of...
Dr. Fauci announces retirement from NIAID to become Major League Baseball Pitching Coach
Dr. Anthony Fauci, the esteemed director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, announced this morning that he will be stepping down...
Avascular Necrosis Renamed to Slow Chronic Unfixable Bone Atrophy (SCUBA) to Stop Unnecessary STAT...
BONE ISLAND, FL - A condition long known by a scary-sounding name has been renamed at the American Society for Surgeons of the Hand...
Millions of Men are Getting Bactrim for Summer
With summer here a new trend is sweeping the nation among Mediterranean-descent men: Bactrim. When we looked into this odd trend, via google search, we...