Nursing Student

Nursing student satire

Foley, bloodbath

Patient Can’t Wait to Yank Out Foley, Cause Bloodbath

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ATLANTA, GA - In exciting news today, patient Arnold Starks has announced that later today he will yank out his Foley with "full force...
coughing

As Nurse Leans In for a Listen, Patient Can Think of No Better Time...

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BOSTON, MA - As Nurse Ned Franks leans in with a stethoscope to listen, patient Andy Charles can think of no better time today than right...
nurse helping

Study Shows ‘Hold On, I’ll Get Your Nurse’ Most Common Phrase Doctors Say to...

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A new survey published this month reveals the sentence “Hold on, I’ll get your nurse” to be the most common thing doctors say to...

Rosetta Stone: OB/GYN Edition

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ARLINGTON, VA - In an effort to boost sales, language software giant Rosetta Stone launches the first of a long line of medical language...

Half Slice of Cake Left for Night Shift

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Keeping with longstanding tradition, med-surg dayshift nurses consumed all the break room cake except for half of a slice. “Thank you to all the doctors...
upset patient

Repeatedly Yelling “NURSE!!!” Less Effective Than Using Call Bell, Study Finds

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A new study published in The Lancet shows that using the call bell to get your nurse’s attention is 25% more effective than repeatedly...
iv pca infusion pump WiFi

New IV Pumps Have Silence Button Lasting 24 Hours

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GREENVILLE, SC - Hailing it as 2019's best new medical invention, a new IV pump by Shmalaris is like any other competitor's IV pump...
nursing shift

Miss Colorado Will Only Accept Apology from “The View” Hosts After They Work a...

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Miss Colorado, Kelly Johnson RN, will only accept an apology from The View hosts, Michelle Collins and Joy Behar after they have worked and survived...
perfect PowerPoint presentation

Tips for Creating the Perfect PowerPoint Presentation

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Creation and presentation of the perfect PowerPoint presentation (PPPP or Quadruple P) is always the Holy Grail for any health care professional, no matter...
the view

Patient Leaps to Death After Hospital TV Stuck on The View, Joint Commission Investigating

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OMAHA, NE - Burpelson Hospital is investigating the apparent suicide of patient Grover Downs on the 13-East psychiatric unit.  Mr. Downs, an 84-year-old man...