Breaking: Nurse Initiates Lesser-Known Chloride Repletion Protocol
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Nurse Jess Casamento of Ochsner Medical Center is one of the best when it comes to repleting electrolytes: potassium, magnesium, even...
Oh No: Nurse Misplaces Key, Saline Lock Locked Forever
NEW YORK, NY - Nurse Brad Frohne remains frantic this morning. Yes, it has been more than the average level of busy today but...
CDC Recommends Not Tying Gown in Back to Promote Airflow Through Ass Crack
ATLANTA, GA - After a thorough review of the evidence, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) will make the formal recommendation that...
Rookie Mistake: July Intern Grabs Cup of Decaf Coffee, Defeats the Purpose Entirely
NASHVILLE, TN - In a situation that can be described in no other way but shocking, neophyte July intern Elena Sanchez grabbed a cup...
New Study: Physician Douche Level Correlates With Number Of Nursing Pages Per Shift
HARTFORD, CT - A new study published in JAMA this week demonstrated a direct correlation between the physician douche level (PDL) and and the number...
Patient Demands Nurse Change The Weather
BALTIMORE, MD - Patient Amanda Stanley was having a terrible day: her appendix had ruptured, her hospital gown was unflattering, and she was assigned...
Study Shows ‘Hold On, I’ll Get Your Nurse’ Most Common Phrase Doctors Say to...
A new survey published this month reveals the sentence “Hold on, I’ll get your nurse” to be the most common thing doctors say to...
Breaking News: Nurses Fight Hospital Administrators to Remove Mandated Patient-to-Nurse Ratios
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The hospital administrators at Great American Hospital (GAH) are shaking in their suits today as hundreds of RNs are picketing outside....
STAT Officially Means “Maybe”
BIRMINGHAM, AL - Ever wonder why your 8 AM stat blood draw hasn’t been done even though it’s now 7 PM the next day? ...
