OB-GYN

obstetrician

OB/GYN with Tiny Fingers Has Zero Idea What a Cervix Feels Like

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TUCSON, AZ - A retiring obstetrician, who has requested to remain anonymous for this piece, recently issued a public statement of admission. Presumably to...
Department of Labor

False Alarm: Department of Labor Having Braxton Hicks Contractions

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BROOKLYN, NY - OB/GYNs at New York Methodist Hospital are reassuring New Yorkers that the pains felt at the Department of Labor on Schermerhorn Street...
Doula scuba

Doula Training Offering Scuba Certification for Water Births

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NEW HAVEN, CT – The National Doula Organization (NDO) made an announcement yesterday that they are offering SCUBA classes for their doulas to help...

Non-Confrontational Physician Reassures Patient That the Trichomonas Was Probably Just from a Toilet Seat

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Not all physicians are great at breaking bad news.  One perpetual waffler, Dr. Drew Stapleman, recently reassured his patient that the trichomonads infesting her...

Pumpkin Wishing It Didn’t Turn Down the Gardasil Vaccine

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PUMPKIN PATCH - Local pumpkin really wishing it didn't turn down a Gardasil shot this year. "I have all these bumps all over myself,"...
joint commission

Joint Commission is Coming: Hospital to Change Everything for Three Days Then Revert to...

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EVERY HOSPITAL, USA - Hospital administrators have finally cracked the secret to passing the highly-dreaded Joint Commission inspections.  For decades, the Joint Commission (JC) or...
used speculum tongue depressor

Ten Spectacular Off-Label Uses of the Speculum

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You’re probably familiar with the traditional use of the speculum: visualization of the cervical os, blah blah blah.  We at Gomerblog are pleased to...

Case Report: OB/GYN Resident Not Always Catty, Actually Is Relatively Friendly

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BOCA RATON, FL - Medical students across the nation have been bewildered by the outrageous report that local OB/GYN Ann Hedonia is only catty on...

Med Student Avoids Pelvic Exam for Record 1,429th Straight Day

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KANSAS CITY, MO - Fourth-year medical student Rick Hansen ain't no dummy.  He even says it himself: "I ain't no dummy."  Like most medical...
ACOG

The ACOG Changes Pregnancy to 42 Weeks, Makes Dividing into Trimesters Easier

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HILLBRANCH, SC – The American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology (ACOG) recently released groundbreaking news: pregnancy will now be extended to 42 weeks instead of...