OB-GYN

APGAR 10 Apgart Apgar(t) troponin troponins

Royal Baby Born, London Mother Self-Delivers

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LONDON, ENGLAND – With the entire world watching, the Royal Baby was born at 4:24 p.m., weighing 8 pounds, 6 ounces, APGARS 8 and 9,...

Med Student Avoids Pelvic Exam for Record 1,429th Straight Day

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KANSAS CITY, MO - Fourth-year medical student Rick Hansen ain't no dummy.  He even says it himself: "I ain't no dummy."  Like most medical...
doctors lent

What Are Health Care Professionals Giving Up for Lent (By Specialty)?

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General Surgeon: Evidence-based medicine.  “Oh, your tummy hurts?  Well, let’s open you up and take a look, shall we?” Emergency Medicine: Dilaudid.  The screams will...
hobby lobby birth control pills

Hobby Lobby’s Pharmacies Continue to Sell Birth Control While Denying Workers Coverage

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OKLAHOMA, OK - Hobby Lobby's pharmacies will continue to sell contraceptives after the company's recent Supreme Court victory.  "The contraceptive business, I mean craft...
used speculum tongue depressor

CDC: Stop Using Purulent Speculums as Tongue Depressors

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ATLANTA, GA - Disturbed by a surge in case reports driven by medical providers who are either short on equipment or just extremely lazy,...

Neonatal Falls on the Rise

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A recent report in a major peer reviewed medical journal (then poorly summarized in an advertisement laden medical bulletin email) has uncovered yet another...
Monty Python

Monty Python Teaches Us About Birth & Administration

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Monty Python's The Meaning of Life came out in 1983.  Yet this classic scene, "Part I - The Miracle of Birth," still rings loud and...

Obstetrician Preferred to be Called ‘Vagician’

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TARNIHONNOK, MD - Local OB/GYN or self proclaimed vagician, Dr. Fredrick Schmidt, refuses to wear traditional scrubs in the delivery room.  He'll dim the lights,...

27-Page Birth Plan Even Includes a Zombie Apocalypse Clause

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CLEVELAND, OH – Heather Briggins, from Parma Heights, recently was admitted to St. Joe’s in labor at 39 weeks.  She quickly handed her 3-ring-bound birth-plan book to staff. "Glitter...
placenta, discus, Olympics

Placenta Throw to Replace Discus at Rio Olympics

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RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - The International Olympic Committee (IOC) has voted unanimously to replace Track & Field's Discus event with the Placenta Throw...