OB/GYN Chief Resident Finding Christmas Gift Difficult to Open, Performs Emergency Episiotomy
SANTA FE, NM - Area OB/GYN chief resident Dr. Sandra Bonit came home for the holidays after a week of night float. “Seven straight...
New Study Shows Father’s Breast Milk Improves Babies’ Intelligence over Mother’s Breast Milk
DENVER, CO – AstraZeneca recently announced that its new drug, Milkaman, was approved by the FDA for male breastfeeding. This novel drug causes pectoral muscle cells in...
Medical Professions as NFL Teams
Anesthesia is the Cincinnati Bengals: no one knows anyone on the team; they rotate so often it’s not worth learning names anyway.
Orthopaedics are the...
Hospitals Now Joining Black Friday Frenzy
NEW YORK, NY - Black Friday is hitting America very soon. Stores are now opening their doors almost immediately after millions of Americans finish off eating...
Ben & Jerry’s Opens Women’s Health Clinic, Offers “Free Cone Biopsy Day”
SOUTH BURLINGTON, VT—The line outside the new Ben & Jerry’s Women’s Health Clinic extended for at least 3 miles as people waited for the...
Breaking News: Da Vinci Robot Becomes Sentient, Terrorizes City
NEW YORK, NY - In breaking news, NYU's da Vinci Surgical Robot became sentient earlier this morning and started to rebel against its human masters.
"It's...
North Korea Agrees to Sync Menstrual Periods with South Korea in Display of Unity
KOREAN PENINSULA - In a display of unity, North Korean leader Kim Jung Un has agreed to change his country's menstrual periods so that...
Placenta Throw to Replace Discus at Rio Olympics
RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - The International Olympic Committee (IOC) has voted unanimously to replace Track & Field's Discus event with the Placenta Throw...
Tips: How to Treat a Pager That Keeps Going Off Like It Has Seizures
Sadly, despite all the technological advances we've made, a good portion of health care professionals still carry an object as archaic and arguably less...
Water Main Break in Pregnant Woman’s Amniotic Sac Causes Major Flooding
DECATUR, GA - Flooding has closed East Ponce de Leon Avenue and Commerce Drive in downtown Decatur, overwhelming the neighborhood with several feet of amniotic...