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These are probably the best pages any health care professional can ask for!2016-03-06

“We’re building forts out of drapes, wanna join?! – Anesthesia, OR 4″

Pager - Admin

“Go home, I’m gonna write ur notes today – Hospital Administrator”

Pager - AMA

“Patient leaving AMA ;)”

Pager - Colleague

“OK if I cover ur pager while u take the day off? – Colleague”

Pager - DNR

“FYI, we made every patient in the hospital DNR! – Palliative Care

Pager - ER Closed

“We closed the ER for today, no new admissions! – The ED”

Pager - Family

“Family figured it out, no questions for the MD!”

Pager - Gowns

“New infectious disease policy: no yellow gowns required! – ID”

Pager - IT

“Free sledgehammers, go nuts on any broken computers! – IT”

Pager - Open Beverages

“OK to leave open beverages at nurses station! – Joint Commission”

Pager - OSH

“Cancel the transfer, we’ll care for the patient! – Outside Hospital”

Pager - Pens

“Good news, we found some of your lost pens!”

Pager - Pharmacy

“National shortage of IV Dilaudid, no plans for restocking – Pharmacy”

Pager - Primary

“We’ll be happy to take over as primary team! – Other team”

Pager - Rads

“Send patient, we are not backed up – Radiology”

Pager - Tylenol

“Patient in pain, only asking for Tylenol.  Historic moment!!”

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Dr. 99
First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.