Nursing

nursing diagnosis

Is Your Nurse Trying To Hook Up With You?

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Being admitted as a patient can be a scary and vulnerable time. Why not take this opportunity to get laid in your hospital bed,...
UberGURNEY

Uber Offers In-Hospital Patient Transport with UberGURNEY

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Uber’s success knows no bounds. After infiltrating cities across the world with their groundbreaking online-based transportation service, Uber is infiltrating...

Vaccines Cause Children to Love Minecraft

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It really couldn’t be more obvious, just look around.  We NEVER saw a child playing Minecraft when I was growing up, never.  Now it’s...
insulin

FDA Bans Insulin Amid Reports of Increased Amputations and Other Life Threatening Diseases

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MEMPHIS, TN – The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) announced on Monday that they are pulling insulin off the shelves across the country.  "We...
nursing computer

Resident Tempts Fate, Sits Down at Nursing Computer

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JACKSONVILLE, FL – Greg Schmidt, an internal medicine resident at Mercy Hospital put his career in danger earlier this week when he chose to...

Nurse confines fidgety med student in OR to Bouncy Seat

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Phoenix, AZ: In what can only be described as an act of creative desperation, circulating nurse Susan Bremington found a novel way of dealing...
doctor upset

Hospital Administrators Consider Renaming MDs to “Morphine & Dilaudid”

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TAMPA, FL - Following the immense success of renaming registered nurses (RNs) to “Refreshments & Narcotics,” hospital administrators at Tampa Memorial Cross Hospital (TMCH)...
hug, hugging

Struggling Intern Asking for ‘Just One Hug’

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BOSTON, MA - "Just one hug" is all intern Philip Geary is asking, if not BEGGING, from his fellow interns, residents, students, nurses, attendings,...
blood products

Blood Bank to Require More Paperwork, First-Born Child to Release Blood Products

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GREENSBORO, NC - In an effort to cut down on costly blood product utilization, hospital administrators at Rocky High Hospital have put pressure on...
iv pca infusion pump WiFi

In the Name of Patient Satisfaction, IV Pumps Fitted with WiFi

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BOSTON, MA - As much as they don’t want to admit it, health care professionals have succumbed to the reality of patient satisfaction surveys...