hospital administrator golfing

A Modern Hippocratic Oath for Hospital Administrators

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Going forward, I swear to fulfill, to the best of my ability and judgment, this cost-saving and value-added covenant: I am an agent of change...

Flint’s Water is Corrosive and Full of Lead: What Do You Think?

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Flint Michigan's water has been full of lead since 2014, just recently they declared it to be a national emergency.  What are the medical...

Hospital Custodial Manager: ‘I Love Irritating the S**t Out of Them’

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CLEVELAND, OH - GomerBlog reporters are able to confirm that custodial staff at Memorial Hospital do indeed intentionally buff floors and clean bathrooms at...
iv pca infusion pump WiFi

In the Name of Patient Satisfaction, IV Pumps Fitted with WiFi

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BOSTON, MA - As much as they don’t want to admit it, health care professionals have succumbed to the reality of patient satisfaction surveys...

Administrators Change Nurses’ Day to Feb 29th

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CHICAGO, IL - Rush University Hospital Administrators made a recent change to the much celebrated: Nurses' Week. They eliminated existing nurses' week, May 6-12th, and...
childhood obesity

Thai Cave Divers to Locate Obese Patient’s Genitals

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KEARNEY, NE - With options dwindling, all hopes rest on the heroic divers who saved the boys in Thailand to locate a 600-lb. man’s...
dermabond surgical glue

Dermabond Repackages for a Sexier Product

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Dermabond, a skin glue widely used for surgical skin closure, has had a recent falloff in use as hospitals push cost-conscious practices.  In response,...
surgery

Surgeon Performs Appendectomy, Still Trying to Convince OR Staff That It Was Infected

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KNOXVILLE, TN – General surgeon Dr. Hendrick Knightsville is being credited with quite an acting performance in operating room 7.  Dr. Knightsville took a...
ipad for nurses

Hospital to Replace Clipboard Nurses with iPad Nurses

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SEATTLE, WA - Greater Seattle Memorial Hospital announced plans earlier today to replace its clipboard nurses with iPad nurses.  Specifically, senior-level nursing personnel who...

Medical Professions as NFL Teams

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Anesthesia is the Cincinnati Bengals: no one knows anyone on the team; they rotate so often it’s not worth learning names anyway.   Orthopaedics are the...