Eco-Unfriendly Plastic Urinary Catheters Banned, Replaced by Paper Ones
SEATTLE, WA—Following the successful mission to replace hazardous plastic straws with paper ones, environmentalists are now targeting plastic urinary catheters, hoping to swap them
out...
Breaking News: Doctor Cycles Blood Pressure Cuff By Himself
JANESVILLE, MI - In an unprecedented occurrence Dr. Fern noticed the absence of a morning blood pressure. Starting to walk out of the room...
New AHA Hypertension Practice Guidelines: A Resident’s Personal Struggle on Night Float
The American Heart Association 2017 Hypertension Practice Guidelines has just recently come out with new guidelines, changing the standard definition of hypertension from 140/90...
Physicians Hold Drexit Vote, Doctors Exit Medicine
KANSAS CITY, KS - A large, synchronous exhale was heard this morning as the results of Drexit, or Doctors Exiting Medicine, came in. Millions of...
ZDoggMD: I Try
Dr. Zubin Damania aka ZDoggMD is at it again with a fantastic parody of Macy Gray: "I Try (To Be A Nurse)." If you enjoyed...
American Nurses Association Approves Call Lights with Lockout Intervals
SILVER SPRING, MD - In an effort to bolster nursing satisfaction, the American Nurses Association (ANA) have unanimously approved the replacement of current call...
Report: Nurse’s Candy Drawer, Only Chocolate Laffy Taffy and Dum Dums Left
CARDIAC FLOOR - Reports around the hospital are the nurse’s candy drawer on the cardiac floor has run cold.
"You mean to tell me I started...
Surgeon Performs Appendectomy, Still Trying to Convince OR Staff That It Was Infected
KNOXVILLE, TN – General surgeon Dr. Hendrick Knightsville is being credited with quite an acting performance in operating room 7. Dr. Knightsville took a...
SHITSTORM Red Flag Phrases During Patient Turnover
DJIBOUTI, DJIBOUTI - The 5th annual Seminar of Hospital Internists Technologists Surgeons Traumatologists Others RNs and More (SHITSTORM) convention resulted in the drafting of...
Hospital Publishes 6 Patient Guidelines: ‘Please Try Not to Confuse Us with a Hotel’
Here at Outside Hospital (OSH), we are 100% committed to your satisfaction as a patient. To this end, we have created this pamphlet, which...