Physicians Hold Drexit Vote, Doctors Exit Medicine
KANSAS CITY, KS - A large, synchronous exhale was heard this morning as the results of Drexit, or Doctors Exiting Medicine, came in. Millions of...
Popular New Manager Cool With Falls As Long As No Injury
SAN DIEGO, CA - Red State Regional Chief Nursing Officer, Dolly McGuire, took 10 minutes at the end of one of last week’s Daily...
New Law Now Requires Nurses to Obtain Hunting License Before Preying on New Interns
SACRAMENTO, CA – The controversial bill which aims to protect new interns from being exploited by hospital staff was signed into law by Governor...
CDC: Inhale Lysol Before, After Every COVID-19 Encounter
ATLANTA, GA - Based on recent review of the available evidence, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) strongly recommends inhaling Lysol before...
Meet CrossSh*t, The High-Intensity Bowel Program
SANTA CRUZ, CA - The founders of CrossFit Greg Glassman and Lauren Jenai have announced the creation of a new strength and conditioning program to...
Neurologists Recommend Gas-X for Treatment of Brain Farts
MINNEAPOLIS, MN - The American Academy of Neurology (AAN) has updated their guidelines for the diagnosis and management of brain farts, a condition characterized...
Code Brown Forces Hospital Evacuation; SWAT and FBI Called In
LOS ANGELES, CA - A local medical center was evacuated this morning after a Code Brown in the pediatric wing of the hospital quickly...
Wound Care Nurse Calls Pressure Ulcer a Rare “Stage 5”
BOSTON, MA - Nurse Amy Johnson has seen some pretty bad sacral decubitus ulcers in her long career as a wound care nurse, but...
Doctor Frantically Considers Options As He Realizes There’s No Toilet Paper Mid-Poop
EL PASO, TX - Facing a crisis of unheralded proportions, medicine intern Edwin Veracruz is mulling over any and all options as he realizes...
Breaking: Turns Out the Patient’s Name Really is John Doe
NASHVILLE, TN - Well, it was bound to happen one day: members of the intensive care unit (ICU) team at Vanderbilt University have realized...