“Rewards” Program for Frequent Flyers Includes Unlimited, Complimentary Discharges
ATLANTA, GA - Atlanta University Hospital (AUH) has unveiled a new tiered hospital rewards program for frequent flyers that provides numerous benefits, including free...
Lost Your Car in the Hospital Garage? Order a Consult
If it has happened once, it has happened a million times: you forgot where you parked. It is the end of the day and...
Hospital Administrators March on D.C. for Safer Administrator:Patient Ratios
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Yesterday, American hospital administrators took a bold step in voicing collective frustration with their work environment, as a throng of over...
Placement Tips: How to Place a Patient on the Moon
If there's something social workers and hospitalists are really good at it's placement. But every once in a while a difficult placement comes along....
CDC: Medical Noncompliance Actually Caused by Virus
ATLANTA, GA - In breaking news, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has discovered a new virus that causes medical noncompliance, thereby...
Slow-A** Da Vinci Holds Up Lines, Taking Forever to Vote
WASHINGTON, DC - The Da Vinci Surgical Robot is proudly exercising his right to vote this Election Day, but here's the problem: he's slow...
Hospital Builds $100M Gorgeous Atrium Expansion, Nurse Bonuses Cut
CLEVELAND, OH – Mercy Hospital has just completed a new addition to their hospital: a grandiose beautiful atrium. This new expansion is "a beautiful and...
Healthy Ambulating Male Continues to Ask Nurses for Urinal
ATTLEBORO, MA - A very upset Ronald Stern is suing Sturdy Memorial Hospital for the pain and suffering he experienced when his nurse asked...
American Nurses Association Approves Call Lights with Lockout Intervals
SILVER SPRING, MD - In an effort to bolster nursing satisfaction, the American Nurses Association (ANA) have unanimously approved the replacement of current call...
Patient Able to Get Dilaudid Just Before Leaving AMA
JACKSONVILLE, FL – Michael Redmond - a patient so regular to St. Joseph Hospital’s ER that if he doesn’t show up for a couple days,...