Thai Cave Divers to Locate Obese Patient’s Genitals
KEARNEY, NE - With options dwindling, all hopes rest on the heroic divers who saved the boys in Thailand to locate a 600-lb. man’s...
April Fools! This Nurse Was Assigned Only 1 New Admit, Turns Out It Was...
SACRAMENTO, CA - When Nurse Shannon came to work today, she was assigned to only one admit. "Are we slow?" Shannon thought as to...
Hospital Unveils Pain Scale That Goes to Eleven
VANCOUVER, BC - In the movie This is Spinal Tap, guitarist Nigel Tufnel proudly shows off an amplifier that turns up to eleven instead...
CDC: Inhale Lysol Before, After Every COVID-19 Encounter
ATLANTA, GA - Based on recent review of the available evidence, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) strongly recommends inhaling Lysol before...
Lineup Released for Boo-Boo Fest 2015
INDIO, CA - With an early morning Facebook post and Tweet, the Boo-Boo Fest Medical & Surgical Arts Festival revealed their highly-anticipated lineup for...
Breaking: Turns Out the Patient’s Name Really is John Doe
NASHVILLE, TN - Well, it was bound to happen one day: members of the intensive care unit (ICU) team at Vanderbilt University have realized...
‘Hospital Medicine’ Renamed ‘Placement Medicine’
PHILADELPHIA, PA - The Society of Hospital Medicine (SHM) has announced that effective January 1, 2017, the specialty known as Hospital Medicine will be...
Patient Still 10/10 Pain Even After a ‘Being-Set-On-Fire’ Analogy
NEWARK, NJ - Patient Deborah Skemp woke up today at 6:30 a.m. during rounds by her physician Dr. Waters. He asked her the usual morning...
Inventor of “Dimaudid” Takes Company Public, Makes Billions
NEW YORK, NY - An attending physician of emergency medicine at New York City Hospital recently took her private pharmaceutical company public, making a...