Nursing

Trojan Develops New Magnum Size Foley Catheters; ‘It’s About Time,’ Say 100% of Surveyed...

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HOUSTON, TX - America’s number one trusted brand for contraception made a bold leap into the medical field today with the launch of Foley...

How to Give Report to a Disgruntled Day Shift Nurse

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It was that time again, as the day shift filed out of the report room. Offgoing night nurse Linda Licencee groaned as she anxiously...
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20 Out of 10 Medical Providers Annoyed by Patients’ Misuse of Pain Scales

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ATLANTA, GA - According to a new study by the Centers for Pain Control & Other Nonsense (CPCON), a whopping 20 out of 10...
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Hospital to Replace Clipboard Nurses with iPad Nurses

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SEATTLE, WA - Greater Seattle Memorial Hospital announced plans earlier today to replace its clipboard nurses with iPad nurses.  Specifically, senior-level nursing personnel who...

Dr. Clinton Gets Away with Wearing Pantsuit in OR

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - A shocking story coming from Bethesda Medical Center, where Hillary Clinton has been wearing a pantsuit in the operating room.  She refuses...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

New CDC Recommendation: Ignore Patients with Pain > 4

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ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has issued a new recommendation on the heels of March's "CDC Guideline for...
PGA pro turns hospital administrator

PGA Pro Becomes Hospital Administrator to Make More Money, Play More Golf

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SCOTTSDALE, AZ - After three mediocre years on the Tour, 28-year-old PGA pro Blake Johnson announced that he is calling it quits and starting...
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Map My Couch App Released in Response to Map My Run App

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In response to the numerous Map My Run and other workout posts that inundate newsfeeds on Facebook, a psychology group out of Houston TX...

Attending Answers Telephone at Nurse’s Station, Immediately Regrets Decision

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IOWA CITY, IA - Havoc struck the medical ICU this morning when 49 year old intensivist Oliver Reynolds inexplicably decided to answer a telephone...
shag OR

Operating Room from the 70s Shutting Down, ‘Difficult to Clean’

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NEW YORK, NY – Disco isn’t dead, yet.  One of the last remaining icons of the great disco movement in NYC still remains in...