Slow-A** Da Vinci Holds Up Lines, Taking Forever to Vote
WASHINGTON, DC - The Da Vinci Surgical Robot is proudly exercising his right to vote this Election Day, but here's the problem: he's slow...
Nursing Advice Line Renamed ‘Go to ER’ Line
CHICAGO, IL - In a stunning announcement today, leadership at the Association for Telephonic Nurse Advisors reported that effective June 1st their flagship "Nurse...
Charting Suspended, Call Lights Disabled, Bathroom Breaks Okayed for National Nurses Week
SILVER SPRING, MD – To celebrate National Nurses Week from May 6 to May 12 this year, hospitals and clinics across the country are...
Patient Successfully Makes Appointment for the ED
LONG BEACH, CA – Nancy J. is well known to the local Emergency Department at St. Joseph, a community hospital in LA County. The...
New Littmann Stethoscope Allows You to Hear One’s Thoughts
ST. PAUL, MN - Manufacturer 3M has released a new Littman Mind-Reading I Stethoscope for health care practitioners to help diagnose someone else’s thoughts,...
Patient in Room 3 Worried After Code Blues in 1, 2, 4 & 5
ATLANTA, GA - “Oh God oh God oh God!” is what Tim McConnell said to himself in a fit of paranoia after a fourth...
Brothel Workers Consulted in Patient Satisfaction Project
RENO, NV - In what is being called a "fresh" and "unorthodox" effort to boost patient satisfaction survey scores, Heart of The Valley Hospital...
New CPR Mannequin to More Accurately Reflect Average American
WASHINGTON – The American Heart Association (AHA) announced today the release of a new line of CPR mannequins, designed to more accurately reflect the...
Nurse Confesses She’s Just In It To Get Yelled At
AUSTIN, TX - Nurse Regan Ludwig recently admitted to ABC News that she works incredibly hard as a nurse because she just loves getting...
Charge Nurse Forgets To Assign Herself Patients For Fifth Week In A Row
Charge Nurse Cynthia Rollins recently forgot to assign herself patients….. yet again. She swears it wasn’t purposeful but rather simply a “senior moment” in...