Nursing

potassium

Team to Replete the Hell Out of Patient’s Potassium

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LOUISVILLE, KY - An inpatient multidisciplinary team of nurses, nurse practitioners, physician assistants, nutritionists, hospitalists, nephrologists, and cardiologists at Louisville Medical Center (LMC) has...
barrage pages

Hospitalists Run for Cover as Nurses Heave Barrage of Pages Near Shift Change

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Hospitalists know the drill all too well: It doesn’t matter if you haven’t been paged all day, expect hellfire starting...
nurse prison

Nurses Visit Local Jail To See What Freedom Looks Like

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NEBRASKA - The nurses of University of Midwest Hospital recently visited Cook County jail to see what freedom looks like. They were shocked to...
medical patient on cell phone

Cell Phones Newest Weapon in Fight Against Pain

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BOSTON, MA - Cell phones are now on the list of items previously thought to have no therapeutic benefit, which are now being researched...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC Plans to Move and Quarantine Unvaccinated Families

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ATLANTA, GA - In a move that is sure to spark controversy and protest, the CDC released Proposition 23.4 yesterday which grants state governments the...

Mutated Pediatric Names Linked to Higher Mortality

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ATLANTA, GA - The lead article in this month’s Journal of Pediatric Critical Care started with a few simple observations. "I had two patients in...

Fifth Pressor Discovered: ICU Stay Extended 2 Days, No Difference in Outcome

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LOS ANGELES, CA – Critical care physicians and nurses rejoiced Thursday at the news of a 5th vasopressor drug-class discovery. 5-omega-dopanephrinone or "Omnipress" is a...
wearing scrubs to restaurant

Local Restaurant with Serious Health Violations, Owner Cites Pandering to Scrub-Wearing Customers as Cause

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While there are some toolbags that still think it is cool to wear scrubs in public, one restaurant owner claims it may cause his...
elf getting sick

Collection of Hospital Holiday Decoration Pics

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We want to thank our fans for these hospital holiday decorations crafted with hospital materials (don't tell the hospital administrators), exceptional wit, and extreme...
Saline Lock Heparin Lock

Oh No: Nurse Misplaces Key, Saline Lock Locked Forever

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NEW YORK, NY - Nurse Brad Frohne remains frantic this morning.  Yes, it has been more than the average level of busy today but...