So You Develop Chest Pain on a Gondola, What to Do Next
How much do you hate this scenario? You're taking a lovely ride on your gondola when it happens: substernal 10 out of 10 chest...
Hospital Enacts New Mandatory Happy Hour for Employees
BOSTON, MA - "Go figure out the best way to improve patient safety and medical care at our hospital," was the charge that CEO of...
Administrators Throw Nursing Appreciation Lunch, Nurses Too Short-Staffed to Attend
“They just don’t appreciate our appreciation!” exclaimed CEO Benjamin Green, referencing the absence of nurses as he gathered with his fellow administrators in Good...
Nurses Fired Over Grim Reaper Halloween Costumes
HOUSTON, TX - Two Nurses were relieved of duty on Friday at Good Samaritan Mercy Hospital for dressing up as The Grim Reaper during...
CDC Advises Robert De Niro To Be Sent To Jail Until Deemed Safe
ATLANTA, GA - Last week Robert De Niro pushed for the Andrew Wakefield (yes, that Wakefield) film Vaxxed to be screened. "We need to have the...
How to Give Report to a Disgruntled Day Shift Nurse
It was that time again, as the day shift filed out of the report room. Offgoing night nurse Linda Licencee groaned as she anxiously...
Little Man Living in Alaris Pump: I’m Lonely
GomerBlog was able to get an exclusive interview with the little man who lives in the Alaris pump, currently in room 2016. “I’m just...
Doctor Frantically Considers Options As He Realizes There’s No Toilet Paper Mid-Poop
EL PASO, TX - Facing a crisis of unheralded proportions, medicine intern Edwin Veracruz is mulling over any and all options as he realizes...
Patient Can’t Wait to Yank Out Foley, Cause Bloodbath
ATLANTA, GA - In exciting news today, patient Arnold Starks has announced that later today he will yank out his Foley with "full force...
Fifth Pressor Discovered: ICU Stay Extended 2 Days, No Difference in Outcome
LOS ANGELES, CA – Critical care physicians and nurses rejoiced Thursday at the news of a 5th vasopressor drug-class discovery. 5-omega-dopanephrinone or "Omnipress" is a...