Health Department Gives Parrots To Patients Who Need Reminding
MADISON, WI — The Dane County Department of Public Health has issued free parrots to 250 of the most frequently hospitalized patients in Madison....
Nursing Student Enters OR Without Shoe Covers: Beatings Commence
WARWICK, RI - The student nurse stared nervously at the blood-red line bisecting the hallway. Scrub hat and surgical mask, check. Full breakfast and...
Patient Successfully Makes Appointment for the ED
LONG BEACH, CA – Nancy J. is well known to the local Emergency Department at St. Joseph, a community hospital in LA County. The...
CDC Advises Robert De Niro To Be Sent To Jail Until Deemed Safe
ATLANTA, GA - Last week Robert De Niro pushed for the Andrew Wakefield (yes, that Wakefield) film Vaxxed to be screened. "We need to have the...
Nurse Assigned to Shake Empty Toner Cartridge Every 5 Minutes
LOUISVILLE, KY - As punishment for not charting a respiratory rate other than 16, first-year nurse Randy Tolbert has been relegated from patient care...
NY/NJ Ebola Algorithm for People with Recent Travel to Africa
* We truly appreciate you risking your life to treat dying people... just stay away from us. *
** Free to leave includes taking mass...
Shaq Mistakes Male Nurse for a Murse
MIAMI, FL – Shaquille O’Neil held a public relations press conference yesterday explaining what led him to carry around a grown man for almost a week.
"I...
Doctors Getting Nursing Degrees to Stay Competitive
BOSTON, MA - Nurse Shannon Wilkens on floor 4 West thought she saw someone she knew in scrubs walking into room 414. "He was tall,...
GI Cocktail Wasn’t the Cocktail Alcoholic Patient Had in Mind
LOUISVILLE, KY - Proud alcoholic Steven D'Amato presented to the Emergency Department (ED) of Louisville Medical Center (LMC) with minor withdrawal symptoms and mild...
Charmin Profits As July Interns Sh*t Themselves
GREEN BAY, WI - Proctor & Gamble's toilet paper brand Charmin expects to see profits soar throughout July as new interns flood hospitals in a blazing...