Nursing

Breaking: Joy Behar Hospitalized, Wonders ‘Why Are There So Many People Pretending to Be...

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NEW YORK, NY – Reports are coming in from NYU where Joy Behar was hospitalized recently.  Due to her recent celebrity status among health...
Gergio Answering Questions

Hospital Gnome Retiring ‘Very Happy with Life’s Work’

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DALLAS, TX – Gergio, the hospital gnome assigned to Methodist Dallas Medical Center, called it quits on Friday.  Over 20 years of disconnecting patient lines,...
bladder trial voiding

Breaking: Urinary Bladder Placed on Trial for Voiding

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ATLANTA, GA - "This voiding trial has begun!" Judge Emerson Rhodes III told a full-capacity, overly-distended courtroom in downtown Atlanta as he called order...

Cinnabon Creates New Insulin Rolls: Insulinabons

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SEATTLE, WA - American purveyor of cinnamon rolls and diabetes, Cinnabon has announced a new tactic to combat the obesity epidemic, not by changing...
attending physician

Doctor Horrified to Learn That Today’s Actually Thursday, Not Friday

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NEW YORK, NY - Colleagues are watching in stunned silence as Mount Sinai Hospital hospitalist Valerie Owens holds back the tears as it hits her...
Saline Lock Heparin Lock

Oh No: Nurse Misplaces Key, Saline Lock Locked Forever

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NEW YORK, NY - Nurse Brad Frohne remains frantic this morning.  Yes, it has been more than the average level of busy today but...
ativan diffuser

FDA Finally Approves The Ativan Diffuser for All Hospital Units

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a closely contested vote, the FDA approved a new medical delivery device this week, the H-Vape 86.  It is an Ativan...

Massachusetts Physician Now 8 Feet Tall Thanks to 80 Physician Extenders!

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NEWTON, MA – Dr. Joe Sefrusso was one of the smaller kids in his neighborhood growing up, always picked last for pickup basketball games....
moonupping sundowning

Sundowning to be Referred to as Moonupping from Hereonin

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LOS ANGELES, CA - The American Academy of Naming Medical Things (AANMT) has issued a mandated that sundowning will now be referred to as...
CPR dummy manikin

Breaking: Nurse Successfully Resuscitates CPR Dummy Back to Human Life

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - In some incredible news, critical care nurse Margie Casamento at Tulane Medical Center became the first health care practitioner to successful...