Orthopedics

orthopedic resident

Orthopedic Resident Suspended for Not Logging Romantic Endeavors

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NEW YORK, NY - Richard Steel, a PGY-4 orthopaedic resident in New York City, was suspended from duties after failing to log his dates...

U.S. Women’s Relay Team Elects to Use Femur, Not Baton for Handoffs

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RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - For this week's upcoming track and field event, the USA Track & Field Women's 4x100m Team has announced that it has...

Crooked Hillary Actually Suffering From Severe Scoliosis

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CHAPPAQUA, NY - Former Democratic Presidential Candidate Hillary Clinton’s Spine Surgeon today revealed that President Donald Trump’s calling her “Crooked Hillary” on the campaign...
sprained ankle

The Difference Between RICE & Rice

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Today, we distinguish between another two often-confused entities: RICE and rice. RICE is an acronym that stands for Rest, Ice, Compression, and Elevation.  RICE is...
external fixator

Ortho Stabilizes Stethoscope with External Fixator

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Stating overwhelming concern over the flimsy nature of medicine colleague Louis Lefebvre's stethoscope, orthopedic surgeon Brock Hammersley has successfully stabilized...

Orthopaedic Surgeon Pays $400,000 to Prevent Son From Matching Into Ophthalmology Residency

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BOSTON, MA - Inspired by the recent college admissions cheating scandal, local Orthopaedic Surgeon Brock Hammersley took matters into his own hands when his...
gout

Area Emergency Physician Successfully Manages Gout Without Consultation

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SALT LAKE CITY, UT - Confetti is raining down from the ceilings as emergency medicine physician Deion Gnosis is being congratulated for diagnosing and...
Arrival heptopods orthopods Louise Banks

‘Arrival’ Heroine, Dr. Louise Banks, Tries to Decipher Wordless Language of Orthopods

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MONTANA - After playing a critical role in deciphering the language of the alien squid-like heptopods as chronicled in last year's real-life documentary Arrival,...
level I level II

Patient Survives & Beats Level I Trauma Center, Moves On to Level II

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ATLANTA, GA - It has been a challenging year for 27-year-old Michael Snead, who broke his right femur in a motorcycle accident 6 months...
orthopedic surgeons

Ortho Calls Temporary Truce in Turf War

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Dr T.K. Anderson, chief of orthopedics at Salter & Harris Memorial Hospital made a stunning announcement in the face of the COVID-19 pandemic. “We...