Area Doctor Now Apologizes Before Every Consult
MARKERSBURG, TN - Dr. Lois Siento thinks she has the key to improving relationships between primary teams and consultants.
"It's simple," she explains. "We give consultant business. Consultants like to get cases from us that...
General Surgery Realizes They’re Becoming the British Empire of Surgery
Local general surgeon, Arthur Wellesley, reclined in his leather armchair yearning for the days of General Surgery domination of nearly every aspect of Surgery. “Back in the day, our forefathers controlled everything. We did...
Medical Ethics: Magician Orthopedist Elects Not to Saw Patient in Half Due to Conflict...
LAS VEGAS, NV - In an apparent conflict of interest, orthopedist and amateur magician, Dr. Felipe Ross, elected not to saw his patient in half. As he prepared for a potentially life and limb...
Family Admits That Putting Grandma in the Top Bunk was Probably a Bad Idea
BROOKLYN, NY - After thinking back on the events that had transpired over the past week, the family of 98-year-old Bertha Schwartz, who presented to Maimonides Medical Center with a left femoral neck fracture...
Ortho Writes Perfect SOAP Note, First No-Worder This Year
LOS ANGELES, CA - Cliff Kershaw of UCLA Medical Center etched his way into the record books early this morning as he wrote the fiscal year’s first perfect note. The southpaw orthopedic surgeon not...
U.S. Women’s Relay Team Elects to Use Femur, Not Baton for Handoffs
RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - For this week's upcoming track and field event, the USA Track & Field Women's 4x100m Team has announced that it has decided against using a traditional baton and, like London 2012,...
The Difference Between Arthropods & Orthopods
Today, we help describe the similarities and differences between two interesting creatures: arthropods and orthopods. Let’s begin!
An arthropod is an invertebrate animal with an exoskeleton that doesn’t care about anyone else’s bones. An orthopod...
Resident’s White Coat Shortened in New Public Shaming Tactic
HOUSTON, TX - In an imaginative new tactic to publicly shame his residents, orthopedic surgeon Dr. Scott Winslow has started reducing the length of his resident’s white coats for each mistake made.
"It all started after a...
Appropriate IM Consult Criteria According to IM Versus According to Ortho
WOONSOCKET, RI - After a decades long proxy battle typically waged through interns and passive aggressive notes, the leaders of the Internal Medicine and Orthopaedic Surgery Departments finally sat down to try to hammer...
Orthopedic Surgeon Uses da Vinci Robot, Voids the Warranty
FLORENCE, ID – The OR staff here at Idaho Regional Medical Center is buzzing with the news that the hospital’s only da Vinci robot was used today for an orthopedic procedure, something which is...