Forget Sheep: Orthopod Counts Bones to Fall Asleep Each Night
MUSCLE SHOALS, AL - Calling the domesticated ruminant animal too soft and fluffy for her liking, area orthopedic surgeon Dr. Tracey Hammerhead prefers counting bones to sheep to help her fall asleep each and...
Peyton Manning No Longer Has The Arm Strength to Deliver Papa John’s Pizzas
DENVER, CO - According to Denver Broncos team doctors, aging 39-year-old quarterback Peyton Manning’s arm strength has significantly diminished to the point where he can no longer deliver Papa John’s pizzas.
“Peyton is throwing more...
Trump Unites Us All with Plan to Build Wall Around Hospitals, Prevent Admissions
CLEVELAND, OH - In front of supporters at the Republican National Convention, Donald Trump has unified not only the Republican Party but also Americans, in particular health care providers, as he announced his plan...
Breaking: Ummm Yeah, Fifty Bucks Says This Kid’s Going into Ortho
MIAMI, FL - Without waiting to see how his prepubescent, teenage, or even college years pan out, Gomerblog is already going to call it: fifty bucks says this kid's going into Orthopedic Surgery.
"I mean, he's what six?"...
Women to be recruited into ortho with promise of no line for bathroom
The American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons has begun a new campaign to entice women to enter a career in orthopaedic surgery. Dr. David Bonaparte, diversity coordinator for the AAOS, believes the new campaign will...
New Orthopedic Surgery Simulator a Warehouse Filled with Tree Stumps, Blunt Ax
PORTLAND, OR - Oregon Health and Sciences University recently unveiled their innovative new orthopedic surgery simulator, which consists of a large industrial warehouse filled with hundreds of tree stumps and a single blunt ax.
“This...
A Cardiologist Explains: Shoulder Pain
Hello, and good afternoon to you. Of course, I know it must be the afternoon because I don't see patients in the morning or evening or weekend anymore.
At any rate, I shall discuss with...
How to Ace Your Ortho Residency Interview
1. Know your favorite bone. Nothing looks worse for an applicant than showing up for the interview and not knowing what your favorite bone. Don’t pick something lame like a foot bone. Choose something...
Avascular Necrosis Renamed to Slow Chronic Unfixable Bone Atrophy (SCUBA) to Stop Unnecessary STAT...
BONE ISLAND, FL - A condition long known by a scary-sounding name has been renamed at the American Society for Surgeons of the Hand of the Lower Extremity (ASSHLE) annual meeting here in sunny...
Orthopedic Surgeon Uses da Vinci Robot, Voids the Warranty
FLORENCE, ID – The OR staff here at Idaho Regional Medical Center is buzzing with the news that the hospital’s only da Vinci robot was used today for an orthopedic procedure, something which is...