Surgery

potato peeler

Op Note Reveals Surgery Performed Using Kitchen Utensils

5
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Surgeons, internists, and health care practitioners alike are stunned by a recent operative or op note left by podiatrist Tony...
doctor shortage

Obama Says Sweeping Changes Will Eliminate Doctor Shortage

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Speaking at a live press conference from the Rose Garden today, President Obama announced major changes to health care, that he...
emr

The Fantasy Google Electronic Medical Record Vs. Reality

12
Maybe Google needs to be hired for the next generation of electronic medical records.  Most of us would appreciate these new changes.

If Elected President, Dr. Ben Carson Plans to Continue Use of PAs & Impenetrable...

12
BALTIMORE, MD - Dr. Ben Carson’s campaign for President is gaining steam, so much so that last week his physician assistant spokesperson needed to...
sponge bath

New Patient Satisfaction Initiative Mandates That All Patient Baths Have “Happy Ending”

38
CARY, NC - In a bold and unprecedented move to increase patient satisfaction scores, administrators at Our Lady of Chronic Narcotic Dependence Hospital outside...
patient cocoon

Medical Team Unable to Penetrate Patient’s Protective Blanket Cocoon

20
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - “I think it’s alive,” whispered intern Jason McCarren to nurse Mya Roberts, both at the patient’s bedside puzzled. “Are you sure?”...
couple kissing

Physician Foreplay 101: How to Seduce Your Doctor

132
Seduce any doctor by using valuable information about his or her specialty to ensure total success in the bedroom. Emergency Medicine Go skydiving to get the...
need coffee

Crisis Brewing as Unit 61’s Coffee Machine Broken

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SEATTLE, WA - A huge crisis is brewing at Arabica Medical Center this morning as medical staff have discovered that the hospital’s best coffee...
laundry

After 25th Stain, Doctor Finally Decides to Wash White Coat

43
NEW YORK, NY - Physician Joel Winters had not washed his white coat in over 10 years.  However, after acquiring a 25th stain today...
emergency physician

Dear BaconSpeak Voice Recognition Software Company

39
I am an emergent see room dock door.  I am righting to let you no how much eye am in joying your voice recognition...